bailey 𓆏💀𓅰🎃

what the hap is fuckening

[dame judy gunch @gavegabron]

why hasn’t instagram figured out a way to say who has a crush on you. They have all the data to do it they’re literally choosing not to

[brennan @BrennanCaldwell]

we need a 3 day weekend:
1 for errands
1 for social activities
1 for staying in bed like we’ve got some Victorian wasting disease

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

if u guys heard the way I talk to myself when i’m alone I would be committed. I do full on bits with myself. inside jokes. been talking out loud in a british accent narrating my bedtime routine for 20 mins now

[bailey 𓆏💀𓅰🎃 @littlebittybai]

nobody warned me that squid game would make me SOB

[House_Wife_Material @butchdebayou]

Sure sex is great but have you ever left your restaurant job

[bailey 𓆏💀𓅰🎃 @littlebittybai]

@TUCKERed_out_22 Huh

[bailey 𓆏💀𓅰🎃 @littlebittybai]

if your toothpaste is anything other than mint I am genuinely terrified of you

[bailey 𓆏💀𓅰🎃 @littlebittybai]

i gave a drunk man named michael a slice of pizza the other day. i hope i see him again

[bailey 𓆏💀𓅰🎃 @littlebittybai]

how many times do I need to run into the corner of my bed before I realize it’s there

[alexa @alexadoingstuff]

people are scared to admit that the best body type is like “works out but not quite enough to counteract the drinking”

[April Clark @autogynefiles]

I love books so much. Hope to read one someday

[bailey 𓆏💀𓅰🎃 @littlebittybai]

@TUCKERed_out_22 HUH

[James @CaucasianJames]

pro tip: pull up to the alley blasting kyoto by yung lean

[jmongrel 🦍 @Jmaninthecut]

Shit could be at its absolute worst but at least I don’t have a kid

[⋆ @tristehomo]

happy first day of fall

[bailey 𓆏💀𓅰🎃 @littlebittybai]

if you are from new jersey, I do not like you. none of you can drive and you have bad attitudes. thank you