Elizabeth Lofgren

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

I just witnessed a women at Starbucks getting a cup of whip cream for her dog... but then she ate the whole thing. Poor doggy

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

@TobiKash_ I just came to ask what is in the sock of the guy wearing Calvin Klein?

[Bob @PoopFromDaButt]

I’m 27 and I just bought my first house. What have you done?

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

@hannahkimberlee Yes please

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

@hannahkimberlee Where can I buy this? 🤤

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

I hate when security guys hit on me. Like excuse me, you’re not making me feel safe rn

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

@_breezerz_ @Holly_Rachelle Oh yesss this is a fav for sure!

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

@_breezerz_ You’re keeping me in suspense. Do tell more

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

Need to do homework and so far I have productively cleaned and organized my living room and kitchen ✌🏼

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

Can’t wait for summer to be over so people stop taking pics of their naked feet

[Tim Stauss @timstauss]

@lizzlo94 If people don't see the brilliance in your humor, then they don't deserve your time. #facts

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

My fam has a football betting league thing and they named it “no crying allowed” so I put my user name as “crying” lol why do I think I’m so funny

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

@_breezerz_ Not that I doubted you, but I just got my books and yes it’s cheaper! 🙌🏼

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

@_breezerz_ Awesome! Good to know 😊

[ଘ(੭ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ✩‧₊˚ @BreeeCass]

me at the mechanic trying to look tough so they don’t scam me because I’m a girl

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

Me: do you want grape, watermelon or bubble gum toothpaste?

4 yr old: gubble bum

The day is looking brighter folks

[Elizabeth Lofgren @lizzlo94]

It’s a wild month at the office. A 7 yr old boy called my boss a mf... please send help

[Tommy Cummings @tommycummings]

My search for the perfect windshield sunshade is over. @theofficenbc