Apparently Everton have already had 100 applications for the vacant managers job.
87 of these have been found to be David Moyes doing funny voices on the phone, like Robin Williams in Mrs Doubtfire.
Flight attendant: Is there a doctor on this flight?
Dad: *nudging me* that should’ve been you
Me: Not now Dad
Dad: Not asking for a social media admin to help, are they?
Me: Dad, there’s a medical emergency happening
Dad: Go and see if live-tweeting the Europa league helps