Simon Quiche Allen

Perennial Part-Timer: drums (The New Mastersounds), record label (One Note Records), photography (see website). MAMiL. UK’s leading cry-baby voiceover artist.

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

People who pine for the “good old days” forget that external hard drives used to require their own dedicated power supply.

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

The US already has a huge problem with divisive identity politics, introducing @marmite there will only make it worse. #LoveitorHateit

[Pundamentalism @Pundamentalism]

Dear @marmite, I'm sadly not in a position to spend $43 on two jars here in the US, so I was hoping we could cut a deal.
In exchange for one large jar per month, I promise to introduce one American per week to your yeasty delights. Do we have a deal?

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

Strong work, chaps 👏🏻

[Larry & Paul @larryandpaul]

NEW SKETCH: What if social media was a real person?

For ALL our sketches/to subscribe: https://t.co/jqSAo5CXTR

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

Though we must endure a typically unreliable English summer, it occasionally serves up the perfect conditions for x-country mountain-biking in North Yorkshire. 🚵🏻‍♂️

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@thececilcharles @scotty_perey So glad I stumbled down this rabbit hole. Great version! Love your voice on this.

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@JohnHMcWhorter .Lexicon Valley podcast: fascinating linguistic musings occasionally punctuated by Steely Dan tunes. Yes please, @johnhmcwhorter 👍🏻

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@mrpauldunphy As you know, I was a cockerpoo before I got my hair cut.

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

How out of date is the most out of date item in your spice drawer?

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

Before and after 💇🏼‍♂️

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@larrybudd1 This is first class

[Rob J Madin @iron_madin]

Three months after everyone else already did it... Decided to film something via Zoom. (Ft. @GreigARJohnson @originalmanuk and Ste Anderson (aka @StevenPeavis)). Full version on YouTube ⬇️⬇️
https://t.co/UUcZyNxe1d #PleaseUpdate

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@mrpauldunphy I read that as “B plus” and was scratching my head until the positive penny dropped. DOH

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@thenealfrancis Someone made a social distancing complaint? 😉

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@ronanhand CANCEL HIM! Plus we should ban all indoor plumbing because the Romans probably invented it or something and they definitely had bad slavery and shit.

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

[Larry & Paul @larryandpaul]

Comedy is cancelled.

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@larryandpaul Tbh I’m not sure I would have bothered to get it cut by now anyway.

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@jonaird I used to look up to him 😔

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@ciaranalgar Also English and Welsh counties.

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@ciaranalgar Countries of Africa is really tricky

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@sipandsavouruk I dare not ask

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

I hope I forget about the toaster’s crumb tray for at least another five years, as emptying it just now was exquisitely satisfying.

[Simon Quiche Allen @logicbuster]

@sipandsavouruk 1) I was alerted by a minor fire 2) most of the crumbs had already escaped the tray and were underneath the toaster
3) it’s possible that Catherine knows about the tray and secretly emptied it two years ago.