Lauren Anderson

dirty streets and good eats

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

they should have a basketball league that is just people UNDER 5’6”

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

this thread && the comments 😭

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

god i’m fucking over this city

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

in a radiohead mood today and if you don’t know what that means, best to leave me alone.

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

in 1998 youd be like what this super power sucks now everything is screaming at you all the time

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

what if ypur superpower was being able to know what people were typing without seeing it.

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

like it was just audio in your head you couldnt turn off.

[Is Today Ted Danson's Birthday? @TedDansonBDay]

Today is Ted Danson’s birthday.

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

is it weird to go on a date with a man who has qualities i find attractive in a woman? #androgyny

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

i miss having pets. and temperatures below 70.

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

perfect amount of time off from work is 3 weeks. no matter what. after that i just start to wonder why i exist…

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

i’m still mad at that college dude i dated at 17 who told me i should read wuthering heights. what a fuckin waste of time.

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

how do concierges manage to simultaneously take their job wayy too seriously but also still usually suck at it?

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

who is this @orvillepeck person and why do i wanna get on his back and ride him like a pony?

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

set boundaries for yourself.
express your feelings.
communication is work.
but it is a labor of self love.
#MentalHealthAwareness

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

saw a guy facetiming while riding an electric divvy and really wanted him to get hit by a self driving car.

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

good afternoon to everyone except for people who have all the notifications and the volume turned on on their phones

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

okay hear me out- onlyfans needs an olympian spotlight. like, endorse that shit. idc about the sports. lemme see those bodies fuckin

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

okay, adults who regularly vacation at disney are FUCKING WEIRD. there, i said it.

[Lauren Anderson @lorzipan]

always flabbergasted that anyone can find drunk me attractive. #slosh