sassy sassquatch

✨voila✨ forever aspiring to do a cartwheel

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

Y’all I’m terrified of needles and always need someone there for moral support whenever I get a vaccination. BUT HERE I AM IN LINE BY MYSELF FOR THE COVID VACCINE AND IM SO EXCITED.

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

the christmas tree is up 🤠

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

@teqilaakeela it's for a position that i dont really /want/ per se but i mean if they accept my ridiculous counter then SIGN ME UP lmao

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

do i do a big balla move and counter with a ridiculous offer......worst they can do is say no right???

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

i told yall to stop inviting me out to stuff but here i am with my planner out and filling it up. stop pls.

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

me: doesnt suffer from insomnia but constantly sabotages sleep cycle by binging webtoons til the sun comes up

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

Personality and charisma 9/10 but toxic? ew 0/10.

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

NO ONE INVITE ME TO ANYTHING UNTIL NEXT YEAR!!!! That includes all weddings!!! I’m maxed out

[Janel Comeau 🍁 @VeryBadLlama]

the nice thing about my ADHD is that if my apartment is haunted I will literally never notice it

“silly me, always leaving these cupboards and drawers open and the sink running at full blast,” I say, as a frustrated ghost screams into a pillow in the corner

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

I can’t believe someone took the entire box of candy I set out. Like didn’t even leave the empty box for me

[e g g @eggiekai]

me coming up w my various schemes and also plans

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

Lol idk why people try to keep me on a tight leash when I’m a free spirit 🤩

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

When u finally connect the dots so ur friends see it then they validate u and u don’t gaslight urself no mo 🥹

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

You can’t lie about going to UT. One look at your calves and it’s a dead giveaway.

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

Sitting with bad posture to cancel out my exorcism arch during bench working sets 🫦🫦

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

Tbh it makes me feel pretty special knowing that I’m benching this dudes squat weight 🥰

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

Pro tip: listen to scary stories/serial killer podcasts while doing cardio for extra motivation

[diana 🦢 @dirtyydian]

“in my slut era”

[sassy sassquatch @lowkeydiane]

The best friends who secretly like each other and transition into a cute awkward couple..I STAN SO HARD