Samantha Ella

🌙🍄melt your headaches, call it home🦋🫀

[uncle ric @ihatethiskid]

Gay mom or thot dad

[🪷 willoreo @velvetedcake]

happy pride 🪽

[zoë 🦭 @crosbyism]

macklin celebrini is just like me i love alcohol and sidney crosby

[Finch @blckbrdquitter]

starting to really dislike this guy for the sole reason I dont live in new york

[Cee☆ @ceelune_]

bra peeking

[Hustlanani @hustlanani]

Sorry I can’t come my clothes look stupid on me

[Fallon @filthtofilth]

*takes a long drag of a cigarette* so the thing is *coughs and pukes*

[tartaglia (combat advice) @ajaxintheair]

stop saying the phrase "hurt people hurt people" around me because i just hear a command twice

[gay columbo @joey_chimes]

oh, you “loved” project hail mary? now replace the word “mary” with “hitler”… not so cool now, huh?

[Paul @orangepaulp]

the type of shit the press asks Zohran at a press conference about street parking:

[jay @kendallhosseini]

i bet sidney crosby’s passwords are easy as fuck to guess

[Danny Goodwin @dannywgoodwin]

If you’re a terrorist at what point do you call it a day in the 4-hour TSA line

[danny @dannethboi]

at the antique store touching a bunch of stuff then rubbing my eyes

[yana 🍄 @pittchdance]

has garcia ever actually done a surgery or is she just always in the elevator

[hyperrealgirl @luxxforlife]

you are not jules from euphoria you are kurt from glee

[ian 𐂂 @grianbites]

Jack crawford : we gotta recruit a special agent to catch the Chesapeake Ripper

The special agent and the chesapeake ripper :

[devin @fartpog]

shit went quadruple platinum in MY house

[⌐╦ᡁ─ 𝖕𝖗𝖊𝖞𝖌𝖎𝖗𝖑 ⌖ @angelemissary_]

you want me to use email? like jeffrey epstein?