unofficial lucas white

Kurt Vonnegut and heathcliff fan account

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

My monthly interest payment went from 1 cent to 2 cents. Now I just sit back and watch 😎

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

@goose01230 The other day I got a hive while talking to a pretty girl and I told her it was because I was nervous

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

@Eall17 do u remember how much ms (mrs? I can’t remember) houseal loved my nose blowing

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

Shoutout to everyone who looked at me when I blew my nose

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

Blessed by able to do a goon voice, cursed by not having a Kermit

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

This reads like Kurt Vonnegut

[ParryGrippsIsOnline @CameronSchmit13]

Remember, various things are laughing matters, but also remember that, simultaneously, other things are not laughing matters. It’s up to you to use your best judgement to determine what is and isn’t.

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

@CameronSchmit13 Literally the biggest struggle of my life

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

I’m going to become Italian (drink coffee at night)

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

@CameronSchmit13 I’ve seen this tweet like 70 times today and for the first 60 or so times I didn’t like it but now

I force an egg down🤷‍♀️

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

If you are a psychic, I do not want to see you with a phone. If you are a wizard, I don’t want to see you with a phone. If you are a guru, please don’t go on your phone in front of me

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

Complex conjugates do seem to not be cool at first, but it is pretty cool that every complex number has a conjugate that when multiplied results in a real number

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

I feel bad for the bugs that get stuck in my arm hair…

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

I showed a girl my twitter and she “oh yeah you’re neurotic” was she flirting???

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

@CameronSchmit13 I was inspired by this tweet

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

Oh hey can I call you back, I’m busy rubbing a hole through the bottom of my shoe with my big toe. Alternatively, oh hey can I call you back I’m busy ripping apart my phone case to get the magnets out of the back

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

Recently I’ve been thinking I should buy a copy of the Rosetta Stone and get busy with some hieroglyphics translation

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

@CameronSchmit13 Vanilla

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

I think I would be happier if I ate only yogurt

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

@goose01230 The one loss

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

I’m gonna make ice cream with chia seeds in it so I can survive on only ice cream but also poop well

[unofficial lucas white @lucaswhite666]

Performative chair, do you even appreciate the depth of human experience?