Alyssa

Dog mom. Photographer. Nats. Heels. Travel. Outdoors. Books. Opinions mostly other people’s.

[Mike Beauvais @MikeBeauvais]

That was Perry Ellis’s freshman season.

[Frances Patano @FrancesPatano]

“did you see this twee—“ let me stop you there. I have seen every tweet. if it is posted I have read it. I am refreshing and I am reading and I am refreshing and I am going to do this for nineteen hours straight because if I miss something it will have a direct electoral effect

[abby govindan @abbygov]

twitter still has the kind of election night juice that I would be itching for like a heroin addict if I had abandoned this place for BlueSky like everyone else did in 2023

[Wuke @wuuuke]

this is an alpha competitor at his absolute apex

[Kyle 🌱 @KylePlantEmoji]

Hearing your pet make heaving sounds in a carpeted room

[Alyssa @lysserbabes]

I just entered for a chance to win the Orbit Loot Sweepstakes! NoPurNec18+Rules @ https://t.co/jcUGGIV359 #orbitloot https://t.co/OZVieVbKi9

[Capt. Andrew Luck @CaptAndrewLuck]

Dearest mother —
I write with riveting news. I have once again — after what felt like an eternity — utilized my sidearm and tactical abilities. I know I swore to stow my sidearm after I retired — but, I am training new soldiers for battle. And it was only proper to unholster my blunderbuss to inspire and guide. My tenacity abounds.
— Andrew

[wor$t aaron in america @rornronrnron]

boston ppl when their friend is trying to drive drunk:

[love drops @lovedropx]

women in PHLEGM (poetry, history, language, english literature, ghost stories, music)

[Kyle 🌱 @KylePlantEmoji]

I hate this man so fucking much and I hate how goddamn funny he is. Constantly adding shit to my lexicon without my consent. Everything's computer. Beautiful. Fuck you

[nova @comfypill]

"you're so quiet" thanks! i actually tried to speak twice but you kept talking over me

[Zack Pearson @Zack_Pearson]

I thought this was another jd vance meme at first glance. No joke lol.

[François Valentin @Valen10Francois]

In ancient Rome, the Consul would have decided to call off the invasion after such a bad omen

[Prison Mitch @Prisonmitch]

Scientists at Stanford University have released news images of what Jesus may have looked like based on electron microscope scans of the Shroud of Turin.

[Ælþemplær @Aelthemplaer]

It was requested by someone.

[Alyssa @lysserbabes]

@Panty_Christ @Mythotard I laughed at this and then had to immediately go outside and touch grass