official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨

the universe provides and i am the universe 🎃

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

I watch TikTok compilations about ADHD & autism on YouTube and YouTube always pairs them with an ad for TikTok which features an ASMR guy SLURPING INTO THE MIC. THIS IS NOT JUST DISCRIMINATION, IT'S DOMESTIC TERRORISM

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

FYI anyone who gets knocked up in the next couple weeks has the chance to have their baby on October's Friday the 13th

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

Me: can you use chickens to clean the flesh off a skull

Backyard chicken owner forums: fighting over breed is more sexy. Naked Neck Show Girl vs Modern Game

This isn't what I wanted. This isn't what anyone wanted

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

Collected acorns, leached the tannins out & ground them into meal, baked cakes. Now we need more acorns.

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

3yo has revealed her foolproof Christmas plan: you can't get taken by Krampus if you ARE Krampus

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

For the public record, I have just coined the phrase "muscle-laden maiden"

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

I think I should wake up every morning by suddenly bolting upright with a terrifying shriek. I just think that'd be a good look for me

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

Constant lightning ... No thunder. Aliens?

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

If Oreos gonna have 200 flavors then they need to sell a variety pack. I'm not committing to the whole box just to find out

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

The problem with horror movies where the plot starts with a mysterious painting featuring a person who "looks exactly like" a character who unwittingly discovers it, is, you gotta actually make the painting look like the person tho (1979 daughters of Satan, 2022 the visitor)

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

@redoubt113 Noice

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

Did Juanita's tortilla chips change their recipe? Not as good now 😭😭😭💔💔💔 I bought 2 bags at the same time and one was the good really brittle, flakey, airy, greasy, crunchy goodness and one is like dense and shit. No good chips left in the world

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

My hallway rainbows (from some prism cling film on the windows) started to go back to red after violet, magenta is real, it's really really real (ok my camera didn't pick it up that well but it was there man) (...cryptid colors?)

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

3yo chanting "Big, Buff, & Brutal! Big, Buff, & Brutal!" while I work out, definitely helps. That's the secret sauce

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

My 3yo is extremely concerned with what she will wear to the Renaissance Faire on Saturday, including needing sufficiently fancy shoes and hat. In case you were questioning where her genetics came from

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

Sorry to the, I assume, real people who do this job, I know it ain't easy to do in bulk and they probably don't get paid enough anyway.

I might have bought some unpainted ones but there weren't any.

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

I went to a IRL game store for the first time in years. they did not have the CR clue which I wanted but they had tons of pre-painted, extremely expensive CR mini sets, which did not look very good at all, and were not even notable/recognizable monsters/npcs from the show

[official black jellybean disposal unit 💀✨ @lysswhit]

But for real the paint jobs on these minis was bad.