MaddyFerguson

I have no patience for lactose...and I won't stand for it.

[Stephen King @StephenKing]

Space Force: I keep thinking of one of those old Saturday morning shows with puppets n shit. Retweet ONLY if you think this is possibly the dumbest idea out of Trump's admittedly dumb head so far.

[Seinfeld Current Day @Seinfeld2000]

OMG!!!! TWITER PLEASE HELP ME OUT

[Georgia Hardstark @GHardstark]

Thinking about moving to L.A.? Be warned: you will waste many precious hours of your life trying to figure out what bit parts you know people in cafes from. But the satisfaction when you figure it out is euphoric. I just spent 10+mins on @jayduplass’s son in Transparent.

[Netflix @netflix]

well its on there now if u wanna ruin it for everyone, neil https://t.co/Q99TMgmfzZ

[MaddyFerguson @MaddyFerguson2]

@danielvankirk
https://t.co/nEy1yHvNy4

#DumbPeopleTown

[Florida Man @_FloridaMan]

Florida, please don't fuck this up

[Doug Stanhope @DougStanhope]

It's about time for a female president that doesn't feel it's necessary to wear lipstick. That's a role model. #DemsInPhilly #DNC

[Edward Snowden @Snowden]

Politics: the art of convincing decent people to forget the lesser of two evils is also evil.

[Pete Holmes @peteholmes]

i'll die before i stop saying lisa needs braces every time someone says dental plan

[Trevor Moore @itrevormoore]

Torn. I hate women but thought the Ghostbusters trailer looked really good.

[Doug Stanhope @DougStanhope]

My cat Meatwig eating @DollarStore tropical trail mix off the bar. If it's lethal, say nothing. I got an early flt.

[Trevor Moore @itrevormoore]

This is a very sad cause that has come to my attention. i am starting a boycott plz help

[Florida Man @_FloridaMan]

Florida Man Who Tried to “Run" to Bermuda in Inflatable Bubble Rescued by Coast Guard, Again https://t.co/YxFDnTRcdJ

[Sarah Silverman @SarahKSilverman]

Rumors are there'll be a woman on the new $10 bill. PLEASE CAN IT BE ME & PLEASE CAN IT BE THIS

[MaddyFerguson @MaddyFerguson2]

@ScottFremont Tie the knot, tie tie the knot

[City of Minneapolis @CityMinneapolis]

Kittens up for adoption Wed. starting at 3 p.m. at Minneapolis Animal Care and Control. https://t.co/9NYGm0TmQg

[Doug Stanhope @DougStanhope]

Watching Charles Manson on @CNN "The Seventies" thinking I coulda done so much more if I had any lasting self-confidence.

[MaddyFerguson @MaddyFerguson2]

@ScottFremont @smellverson Maybe you guys should do a podcast or something...

[MaddyFerguson @MaddyFerguson2]

@ScottFremont Unless they put a chipotle ON mars, maybe that will give us incentive.

[Sen. Bernie Sanders @SenSanders]

A student who studies hard gets hit with insurmountable debt, yet bankers who crashed our economy got a bailout and bonuses.