mad dawg

shares same interests as your middle aged Caucasian father

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Can’t relate

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Cried at dinner tonight when my grandpa got bacon on the side of his salad cause he knew I would want it

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Either the sand is harder to walk on in Mexico or I’m just drunker in Mexico, but I think it’s the sand thing

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

The only acceptable state after reuniting with friends from college

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

When your friend is trying to convince you to get an apartment together

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Got drunk at my family’s garage sale and just started giving shit away for free like Oprah

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Support your local biker bars

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Oh fuck yeah

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Just heard the term “she’d suck the chrome off a trailer hitch” from my father, so that’s a new one for me

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

It’s not even noon and I’ve already had a vape thrown at my head

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Idk what’s wrong with my brain but I’m at a fancy wine tasting and the only thing going through my brain is Cotton Eyed Joe

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Discovered tonight that my love language is nice dinners and Led Zeppelin

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

The things you love the most, cut the deepest (I just got a paper cut from the book I’m reading)

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

I’m 5 depresso shots in when will the pain end

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Being a Sports Fan™️ has taken a toll on my health

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

@JD_Slajchert My brain is still trying to recover from the confusion 😂

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

I bought a book on Amazon and the first 100 pages are a completely different book from the book I ordered. I started what I thought was a romance novel but it was in fact how to be a screenwriter. The confusion I suffered is indescribable

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

I dropped a leftover container of chicken from the fridge onto the floor and I couldn’t find the last piece that spilled for the longest time and lo and behold:

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Dreams are so wild man, 2 hours ago I was flying a plane to Oregon to rescue my sister from a UFO and now I’m at work responding to emails

[mad dawg @madisonparrella]

Spooky szn