Maddy Jacobi

I like cats & chocolate & trying to get 4th graders to think I'm funny.

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@tortuga_jen *deep intake of breath*
... DI HAZ VE PON SAL SE TEN VEN SAL SE TEN VEN SAL SE TEN VEN DI HAZ VE PON SAL SE TEN VEN SON MANDATOS PARA TI

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@emmyfromminny For some reason my first reaction to this was to comment "I'm salivating" but I'm just gonna not & instead say "Omg so cute #memories"

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@emmyfromminny dear god I remember this & being terrified of that girl

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@zwagsaf STOP IT this is bringing up so much rn

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@emmyfromminny I teach 4th grade & have to do 8+4 on my fingers every time

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@emmyfromminny "Add me on snap" is the grossest bio of all on dating apps

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@emmyfromminny You upset? Cause me neither.

[Variety @Variety]

Superstar chef Bobby Flay and Food Network are set to part ways after a 27-year run that has made the restaurateur and businessman one of the country’s most recognizable culinary figures. https://t.co/pkpieJFEqg

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@emmyfromminny Honestly thank you so much for bringing up this very important topic. I have many other, more interesting chefs I would like to bring to the table before B. Flay even comes into my brain.

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@tortuga_jen I remember 4th grade (Mrs. T) correcting us at all moments until we began correcting others.

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@tortuga_jen I don't know why my generosity is so unappealing to you ugh

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@tortuga_jen Would you like two mints or none?

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@tortuga_jen This is so depressing & so true at the same time. Thank you for this dark realization.

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@zwagsaf I am so uncomfy omfg this is not real

[cordarrelle patterson @ceeflashpee84]

Adam Mf thielen my dawg!!!! @athielen19

[NFL @NFL]

DALVIN COOK ARE YOU SERIOUS?!

FOUR TOUCHDOWNS. UNSTOPPABLE.

📺: #MINvsGB on FOX
📱: NFL app // Yahoo Sports app: https://t.co/J6oAb5WnGm

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@tortuga_jen When you finish it, I highly recommend Hell on Wheels & Kitchen Nightmares for more Gordon Ramsay British yelling. That is, once you finish your homework of course. 😉

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

I've chewed off all my fingernails so now I have no way to cope with the anxiety during this Vikings game #helpme

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@satellitedisch When they score or make great plays, I feel like squealing & hugging them like they're my amigos

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@satellitedisch Girl I feel you. I text my mom & another football friend throughout the whole game. Except this last one cause I was #toostressed

[Maddy Jacobi @madjacobi]

@emmyfromminny Sadly, my first reaction to this was: "What no it's Wednesday!" And then I realized... ...