maya!

life is brutal and full of zasadzkas | ebook person | she/her

[maya! @magieux]

huffing and puffing and pacing around wracking my brain trying to think of a Halloween costume that's the right amount of quirky without being so esoteric that it's unrecognizable

[maya! @magieux]

can't get over naming a character SIR HENRY MUCK and nobody on the show is ever like hey man your name is dumb hahaha... yasmin please end this man

[maya! @magieux]

henry muck: *breathes*
me: yasmin kara-hanani is younger and more beautiful

[maya! @magieux]

eric tao: berating his employees while dressed as henry viii

robert subplot:

[maya! @magieux]

come with me... my love... to the sea... the sea of love (carbonara)...

[maya! @magieux]

if she doesn't remember lady leshurr's queen's speech pt. 5 she's TOO YOUNG FOR YOU

[maya! @magieux]

my sister and I have decided that we are going to go on a clam strip crawl this summer

[maya! @magieux]

@loafpankrastev YEEEEEOWCH! you are very brave indeed my friend

[maya! @magieux]

stages of using a mandoline slicer:
1 just looking at it is scary
2 still scared but i'm being brave and doing it
3 kind of sort of getting the hang of it
4 okay this isn't that bad aka FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY
5 chop off a piece of your nail in an extremely close call
6 repeat

[maya! @magieux]

dark romance books are bad blah blah. boring. duh. here are the ACTUAL worst genres:
- police dog mysteries
- self-help books by former navy seals
- 85% of celebrity memoirs
- 95% of celebrity poetry
- books by CEOs
- anything that markets itself as a "retelling of xyz classic"

[maya! @magieux]

favorite scene in season 2 of The Expanse is when these dudes are drinking 100 year old space whiskey but it's very very obviously just a bottle of St Germain LMFAO

[maya! @magieux]

that person who tweeted about how there's no sunday night 9pm hbo show right now... you should have been watching the gilded age. you should have known better

[maya! @magieux]

mamie fish's phone rn

[maya! @magieux]

the abyss 4k special edition

[maya! @magieux]

the "bagel with cream cheese" i got at penn station versus everyone's reaction... jersey strong baby 💪

[maya! @magieux]

knuckle tats that say ROKU CITY

[maya! @magieux]

if they brought this back it would fix me