I highly recommend having hobbies cause it distracts you from falling in love unnecessarily, and I have an explanation. An ideal mind always mistakes loneliness with love, but busy minds have standards, because when most of your days are filled with things like lifting, creating, reading, learning things like that, you stop chasing people for excitement, because we have a really bad habit of romanticizing every bit of attention that we get. Even if it was not not directed at us with the same intensity of intention, most of the time you are simply wanting something to do.Instead of the feel that you're confusing with wanting.And I strongly believe that best relationships are built when two complete lives meet instead of two bored people who try to become each other's hobby, the interdependence in that situation would create the pressure which finally would become the reason for the eventual breakdown.
“In the end,
I believe there is nothing we must do to be loved.
We spend our lives trying to look more beautiful, more intelligent.
But I've understood two things:
Those who love us see us with their hearts and give us qualities
beyond the ones we truly have.
And those who refuse to love us will never be satisfied with all our efforts.
Yes, truly.
I believe it is important to let our imperfections be.
They are precious,
for they help us understand those who see us with the heart.”
— Frida Kahlo
After you get married, you’re going to meet ‘better’ people than your spouse. You’re going to meet more good-looking people; kinder and more romantic people; more intelligent and funny people. You will meet people who have in abundance what your partner lacks. The mushy and romanticized idea that your partner will be everything to you, and will satisfy all your needs and wants is idolatry. Contentment in marriage is a virtue not often spoken about.
You must wake up every day appreciating everything your partner is to you, everything they have, their beauty and the things that made you marry them because if you focus on everything they don’t do well, you’ll always meet better people. Protect your heart! See their best part, and always remember that your commitment to marry is more of a duty than it is of mushy feelings. You have to stay committed even on the days you feel your spouse is no longer the best fit for you…
-Buchi
When you stop speaking from fear & start speaking from faith, your identity changes, your decisions change, your expectations change & eventually your circumstances change.
the moon watches as i kiss the hollow
of your collarbone,
as i trail my lips down the soft slope
of your breast,
as i open your thighs
and taste the dark secrets
that belong only to me
Unhealed trauma will have you mistaking healthy connections with people as boring and unexciting because you're too used to the drama and turbulence of toxic relationships.
“I’d forgotten that all runaway stories end like this. Everyone goes home. Dorothy clicks her way back to Kansas, Ulysses sails his way home to his wife, Holden Caulfield breaks into his own apartment … You think you can’t go home again? It’s the only place you can ever go.”
— Rebecca Makkai, The Borrower
“We can disagree and still love each other, unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist.”
— James Baldwin
"The young lady is like an egg that everyone wants to fry or boil for food, while the guy is a chick that needs to become a hen before he's sought after."