Makayla 🌲

my humor is drier than your mom

[Makayla 🌲 @mak_kaufman]

Too bad being poor wasn’t just an April fools joke

[Makayla 🌲 @mak_kaufman]

@Fortnite @Fortnite please bring Etheria back to the shop! 🥹

[Nick Mark MD @nickmmark]

Big if true

[Makayla 🌲 @mak_kaufman]

is this serotonin or just caffeine

[LP @lindsey__lnp]

pepper spray in one hand, bag of dog shit in the other. fuck with me

[Makayla 🌲 @mak_kaufman]

Can’t forget about the distant cousins on my elbow

[Makayla 🌲 @mak_kaufman]

The mosquito bites on my foot apparently have siblings and a family of five

[Makayla 🌲 @mak_kaufman]

It’s always let me buy you a drink and never let me buy you a house 😪

[Makayla 🌲 @mak_kaufman]

May all Terries back up and put in reverse this 4th 🙏🏼

[Chef Swampy @thecooler97]

Trying to find peace with my inner boomer.

[river buddy butcher 🤠 @rivbutcher]

Remember like two weeks ago when Elon was like “tell me how to end world hunger and I’ll do it” and then he bought twitter for $44 billion instead

[Makayla 🌲 @mak_kaufman]

MEN: if a male birth control pill becomes available, would you take it?

[Makayla 🌲 @mak_kaufman]

We can change our Snapchat names now, but after years of my cringey middle school snap name I feel committed to it

[Sophie Vershbow @svershbow]

There’s no way to get ahead when your salary increases 1.5% per year but your rent increases 10%.

[Makayla 🌲 @mak_kaufman]

“Olives are just boring ass grapes” @Shmariel_02

[Makayla 🌲 @mak_kaufman]

@realslimswatzy He talkin bout you @Shmariel_02