mallory

I like some things

[mallory @mallorycb]

@omgsidewalks Great Expectations

[mallory @mallorycb]

I have been waiting for almost a month for my return to @VictoriasSecret to process and I am absolutely frothing with rage at how trash their customer service is.

[mallory @mallorycb]

@thirdplacepony Screaming

[Buck @Buck36043Buck]

I was born in the Wrong Generation I was meant to be a Lighthouse Keeper. I love Sitting and Looking at the water and Being alone and Losing my Mind. The Mercury Poisoning sounds up my Alley too

[mallory @mallorycb]

@thirdplacepony Hellllll yeah

[bethany @thenightbethore]

this has reminded me of during covid when bob odenkirk and david cross organised a parody of the gal gadot imagine video with weird al's eat it

[Viggie Smalls @Viggie_Smalls93]

I'm reverse birther-ing Zohran. He was born here actually.

[mallory @mallorycb]

Listen, my hair looks and feels great, but my stylist gave me a SEVENTY DOLLAR deep conditioning treatment without asking or telling me the price and I wanted to throw up. This was after she messaged me 45 mins before my appt to push it back 3 hours.

[mallory @mallorycb]

@thirdplacepony Omg it is 🥰

[mallory @mallorycb]

💔

[Variety @Variety]

Glen Hansard, Irish Musician and 'Once' Star Who Won Oscar for Best Song, Dies at 56 https://t.co/TCaNqqinbP

[mallory @mallorycb]

@thirdplacepony Someone said Helen because she can’t accept anyone else being more beautiful than her but I think Miss Piggy plays multiple roles.

[mallory @mallorycb]

@thirdplacepony

[Homo Honey @DixPeyton]

i can’t think about 9/11 without thinking about Matthew Morrison racing home, going up to the 15th floor, opening the door, and seeing his girlfriend in bed…with another man

[mallory @mallorycb]

@thirdplacepony Truth.

[mallory @mallorycb]

@thirdplacepony I just want everything Muppeted up at this point. A Muppet Clue? GIVE IT TO ME. Moulin Rouge? PLEASE. Donnie Darko? Why the hell not.

[mallory @mallorycb]

Incredible amount of hate in my heart tonight.

[mallory @mallorycb]

@thirdplacepony I also just saw where fucking chips are being recalled for salmonella

[mallory @mallorycb]

@thirdplacepony

[Louise Jensen Duffy (also Ernest Jensen) @LouiseWeebe]

You’re listening to Sisyphus FM, the home of non-stop rock.

[mallory @mallorycb]

@thirdplacepony 💀

[mallory @mallorycb]

Fun game tonight of: Is it the poop parasite or is it the first day of my period? 🤗

[mallory @mallorycb]

@AndyBeshearKY @kenklippenstein You’re gonna have to be a little more aggressive than this, c’mon man.