Mallory Wooley

[Mallory Wooley @malloryg_]

@_voodooclam_ Me

[Donn Gunvalson Parody @DonnGunvalson]

I’m curious about what goes into the psych evaluation for reality TV when I see the people who make it through.

[Britney Spears 🌹🚀 @britneyspears]

Smiling for my haters 🌹🌹🌹

[Jenna Amatulli @ohheyjenna]

fine, I’ll admit it: I miss paying $18 for someone to make me a cocktail

[Ricky Gervais @rickygervais]

13 weeks ago.

[Rule 24.5 No Crying at the Pynk @itsjustkey_]

😂😂😂 my friend at the end was super drunk 😂😂

[Mallory Wooley @malloryg_]

@anna_wooley1 you in the future

[g 7\ @Excaliburoxide]

*corona virus enters my body*

The 4 Flintstone gummies I ate in 2005:

[Barstool Sports @barstoolsports]

World Health Organization: “wash your hands, don’t touch your face, stay out of contact with people who you believe might have coronavirus.”

Me, cause I ain’t no bitch:

https://t.co/i2A0DECvmM

[Mallory Wooley @malloryg_]

@WooleyGrace You

[Ariel🧜🏽‍♀️ @Kamkaam_]

So my brother got pulled over and his girlfriend thought he was lying y’all look at this 😂😂😂😂😂

[Kate Chastain @Kate_Chastain]

There are 2 types of people:

those who post TikTok videos, and adults

[Tife ✨ @tifelomo_]

Her roommate deadass didn’t pay rent for 8 months 💀

[Ricky Gervais @rickygervais]

“I can’t wait to hear all your inspirational speeches about equality, and it’s great that the 3 hours you’re here tonight is the only time your badly paid migrant house staff will get some time off to sleep this week”

[caitie delaney @caitiedelaney]

Here’s my impression of the beauty blogger who lives next door to Adam Driver in Marriage Story who was trying to film a make up tutorial

[Mallory Wooley @malloryg_]

Genuinely trying to watch this season of Very Cavallari and it’s pathetic without @ShannonNoelFord & @reagan_agee 🤦🏼‍♀️ they’re trying sooo hard to create a entertaining storyline 😂

[matt🍆 @MattyLivez]

Nobody:

Absolutely nobody:

Me with my back problems

[Shannon Ford @ShannonNoelFord]

Listen I do not shave for my boyfriend. I shave my entire body into a baby dolphin for my spray tan lady