Mandy

27 • PA • ♒️☯🕉

[Mandy @mandyfbby]

life’s actually pretty cool when your boyfriend isn’t a sociopath

[ely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl]

can’t believe I have one wild & precious life and I’m spending it terrified to answer an email

[Mandy @mandyfbby]

Please don’t think I am checking you out. I am looking at your horrible posture

[Mandy @mandyfbby]

I am held together as a person by a thin film of Elmer’s glue

[😈 @turtlekiosk]

hey quit bugging me or i will inform you of a behavioral pattern that is noticeable to other people but i can tell you are not yet aware of

[Mandy @mandyfbby]

We’re “friends” as much as we can be for two people who avoid the obvious

[carter hambley @carterhambley]

its so cool that a psychiatrist can give you pills but psychologists can only be like… “mmmm just as i suspected. you need true love’s kiss”

[Mandy @mandyfbby]

I’m not a bitch, I’m just hypoglycemic

[lucy ford 🍊 @lucyj_ford]

how it feels to be a girl just trying her best

[Keefler @Keefler_Elf]

11am: drop 4 tabs of acid
noon: Oppenheimer
3pm: ego death + brunch with the boys
5pm: 8gs of shrooms
6pm: Barbie (bring dab pen into theater)
8pm: Dave and Busters

[Sara K. Runnels @omgskr]

I’m not gullible enough to be lured into a cult but I am nosy enough

[mariana @pastapilled]

i wouldn't be the woman i am today without my dad (derogatory)

[Mandy @mandyfbby]

oral fixation + princess complex = craft cocktails

[Mandy @mandyfbby]

one week you think it is a great idea to break your celibacy and the next week you are listening to Lord Huron on repeat in your dark bedroom because he kissed another girl at the movies

[maddi jo @maddddddigray]

i bring a sort of 27-year-old-woman-wearing-a-sensible-jacket vibe to the bar bathroom that 22 year old girls interpret as a mentorship opportunity

[pinar @pienar]

god why am I not the baby wrapped in Baby Cabbage Flannel Wrap Blanket

[꧁𓊈𒆜🅿🅾🅶🆄🅴𒆜𓊉꧂ @pogue25]

@SweatieAngle Recommend me a hobby that'll get me maximum chicks

[🔎Al🔍 @SweatieAngle]

@jestermaxxoor No one who plays video games has ever had sex its true.