Phil Maloney

I'm Phil. I played music. I moved to South Africa. I moved back to Canada. I get lost a lot.

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@hahathehidden @DriveBC @YohoNP They're going to update us 16 minutes ago. #govermenttimewizards

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@DriveBC @jayquellinwild How's that 5 minutes coming? (From 12 minutes ago)

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@billfa9 @RealTimKolla @DriveBC The road is still closed. Some vehicles are blasting past the workers trying to stop them, but that's it.

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

That being said, this is total chaos. There's nobody directing people where to line up, and the workers are simply getting frustrated (understandably) and doing nothing more than swearing and giving up on trying to control the meatheads who insist on getting through @DriveBC

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

I just watched more than a dozen cars and trucks blow past the workers doing their best to stop traffic on hwy1 near #golden. I get that this is frustrating, but the workers are just trying to do their jobs. Gaining a few minutes isn't worth killing someone over. @DriveBC

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

Canada: "Nobody could be a bigger embarrassment to our country than @AirCanada and #pearsonairport . Nobody."

#Rogers : "Hold my beer."

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@kelpimusic @Fighting4Ithaca What is this nonsense?????? Utter tomfoolery if you ask me.

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@TELUSsupport Thank you! Message sent.

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@TELUSsupport hi! I've been having problems with my router for a while. I can't get through on your phone lines (35mins on hold right now and I have to hang up to get into a meeting), and the online chat says it's temporarily unavailable. Can I get help if I send smoke signals?

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

hey @calgaryzoo , I have two questions:

1) wtf? Looks like you oversold zoo lights by a long shot.

2) how do we get a refund? This line is absolutely bonkers.

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@WestJet is your online payment system down? I keep getting an error, so I can't pay online. I've been on hold for about an hour. I can't get a call back until tomorrow at the earliest. Is there anything I can do to book a flight, or should I just use @AirCanada ?

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@TELUSsupport I'm sure you know this, but it's impossible to find any help on your webpage. All I want to do is buy 2 cell phones, and I want to see if there's a discount because I use Telus for internet. But wow...gong show.

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

22 More Weird Things About South Africa https://t.co/RLtmloQJDD

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

A year ago, I was sitting on top of #Mariepskop in South Africa, feeling like the luckiest guy on the planet.

Today, I had the same feeling on top of the #CupandSaucer in Ontario, Canada.

Same shirt, oceans apart, and same love for both countries filling my heart.

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@PeterMa65425361 Great to hear from you man! I hope you have enough brandy to hold you over until the end of lockdown!

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

Getting a Learner’s Licence in South Africa, or How to Give up on life https://t.co/MJyV16PeTM

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

This tweet from 9 hours ago didn't age well...

[Eskom Hld SOC Ltd @Eskom_SA]

We are currently not loadshedding.

Please call your service provider if experiencing a power failure. If serviced by Eskom, call 0860037566 / SMS 35328 / email [email protected] or use MyEskom Customer App to log a call.

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@Eskom_SA Losing power doesn't mean losing productivity???? Now we KNOW you're taking the piss. The impact you're having on the economy would be funny if real lives weren't being impacted, you bunch of colossal wankweasels.

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@makululaanie @Eskom_SA Yep. So that's EXACTLY what they did.

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@makululaanie @Eskom_SA To be fair, it's only Wednesday. But I have no doubt that tomorrow they'll announce loadshedding from Thursday to Sunday. And then on Sunday from Sunday until Thursday, and on and on.

[Phil Maloney @mapleandmarula]

@Eskom_SA Many of your suggestions require people to spend money. Many South Africans haven't been lining their pockets with stolen money like you have, and they don't have much disposable income. How do you propose they pay for all this?