Mary 🖤

college math instructor.
amateur tarot card reader.
stinky sloth baby. 🦥
She/Her

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

I'm so proud of my niece. She's so good with her baby cousin. Entertaining her and being attentive. What a good kid.

@JadeA_Nguyen - good job.

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

Ashley is reading a touch & feel book to her husband.

Hub: *touches book*
A: *snatches it away* I did not say you could touch it yet.

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

Me: Ninja is a hotdog dog!
Evelynn:... Well he's not that skinny.

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

Sometimes when Charlotte doesn't want to sleep I tell her "it's okay, I'll wake you if anything cool happens"

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

Update: she only slept for 15 minutes this last nap and I was able to vacuum and search for something in the garage so. 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

I know I'm supposed to get stuff done while the baby is napping, or nap myself. But all I end up doing is scrolling through videos.

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

Sleep smiles make the *hour* it took to get her down worth it.

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

The group chat with my 3 SILs is just right amount of chaotic.

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

"she do this lot" (referring to me)
"Cry"

Just remembered playing Poetry for Neanderthals back in NC. Ouch.

@gameofkittens

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

Not to brag. But my niece wanted to call me and tell me about the rainbow items she got in Roblox as soon as she got them.

Best aunt ever right here.

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

@7BrewCoffee Cries in central Texas.

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

My kid literally wakes herself up from a nap to toot and then go back to sleep. 😂

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

My husband just threw me for a 180° as he started singing Son By Four's A Puro Dolor

Who is he. He doesn't even speak Spanish.

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

Me: no more ugly photos of my baby. Cute ones only
Charlotte:

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

Hub: it's okay. Just shit your pants. No one will know.

#newborn

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

💜

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

Alright. Who can explain why my @googlecalendar keeps adding Holiday Calendars after I uncheck them. Only on outlook based emails. #googlecalendar

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

My favorite joke rn is telling my 2-week old daughter "don't go anywhere" when I lay her down for a second.

As if she could.

[Mary 🖤 @marebear16b]

Bocephus: Charlie from Charlotte? Nawh, Davy is closer.