Mari Chaccour

the struggle may be real, but it's really, really fun. Always laughing. ✌️

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

If there are any guys out there who are looking for your soulmate, go out with me and I promise you’ll find her right after.

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

Imagine revealing the gender of your unborn child without STARTING A FUCKING WILD FIRE.

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

2020: take your pick. TRUMP: tik tok

[CNN @CNN]

JUST IN: President Trump has issued an executive order that would ban the social media app TikTok from operating in the US in 45 days if it is not sold by its Chinese parent company ByteDance https://t.co/qcZrYbhSp7

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

Went to the gym for the first time in months... just to shave my legs. Bc their hot water never runs out.

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

@zthunda All my outfits look like that too! 🚨but next time you should wear a tighter shirt 😉🖤

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

The only advice I would give myself 10 years ago would be: STOP. WRITING. FACEBOOK. STATUSES!!!!

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

Cant believe Kim K is really gonna get me to start wearing red eye shadow....

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

Why do people have to press elevator buttons more than once? Pressing it 3 times isn’t gonna skip my floor and go to yours.

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

Looking at your stories is easier than dating you and he needs something to do while he’s taking a shit. That’s why he’s watching. Delete him.

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

If my wedding pictures are bad I WILL make everyone come back to redo the entire day.

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

If you can direct message someone... it’s a dating app. I’m lookin at you, LinkedIn.

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

I’m legit losing sleep over my wedding hashtag and I don’t even have a crush on anyone...

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

The closest I am to flying first class is Southwest boarding group A.

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

My favorite time to have sex? Easy. In the Morning.... because that’s when I’m the skinniest.

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

@natalierrenner HAHAHA LITERALLY.

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

Legit so happy I have Facebook so I can see whose kids are currently being potty trained. #blessed

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

Today my friend said “I went out with a guy who was way younger than me... he’s 27”. And that hit me... HARD. #oldAF

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

Why does pornhub have to ruin things by putting "brother sister" in the title. Jeeeesus. #buzzkill

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

I turn 30 in three days and the closest I've ever been to being in love is with Taco Bell. Can I celebrate my birthday there?? @tacobell 🤞🏼

[Mari Chaccour @marichaccour]

@fvckinschilling @OrangeWriters I know, right!!!! Killing the fridge game