Foreskin Gambler

Progressive Cardboard Enthusiast

[Foreskin Gambler @MarkGrouch]

Jerry these are load-bearing walls!

[scary lawyerguy @scarylawyerguy]

Un-fucking-believable.

[Marco Foster @MarcoFoster_]

James Carville: “Trump has no earthly idea what’s coming to him. The vote against him in November is gonna be breathtaking. It’s gonna be a massive rejection of him. He’s a soft man, he gets distracted, he’s obviously not well, he sleeps all the time. He won’t last past Easter 2027”

[Jim Stewartson, Decelerationist 🇨🇦🇺🇦🇺🇸 @jimstewartson]

Please die.

[Viewside Björk 🎨 @OverdozeOnDEEZ]

He was Courtside when The Knicks only won 10 games, he’s one of the only Celebs who pays for their Knicks tickets because him & Dolan hate each other, he doesn’t even use The Celebrity entrance at MSG

Spike Lee’s love for The Knicks is the purest thing in this world, he deserves

[𝕷𝖚𝖈𝖎𝖋𝖊𝖗 @LucifersTweetz]

Charlie Kirk will not be attending tonight's UFC match at the White House. His neck hurts.

[J.J. Abbott @jjabbott]

seems fun

[Kirby 🏴‍☠️ @comicskirby]

Always Sunny debuted the same year as The Office in the US (2005) and has unequivocally gone farther in every episode than The Office ever attempted.

Always Sunny is also still running today.

[𝓔𝓶 ♡ @emkenobi]

Inbred, racist piece of shit. That tattoo looks dumb as hell too.

[Cuckturd @CattardSlim]

Enough!

Our President is incapable of staying awake. EVER!

Trump is a danger to America, & every American.

[CALL TO ACTIVISM @CalltoActivism]

🚨OMG. A fighter just declared “Michelle Obama is a man” on the White House lawn as Joe Rogan chuckles.

Tonight is a DISGRACE to our country, not a celebration.

[Andrew Egger @EggerDC]

How this is not an SNL sketch I couldn't tell you

[Chris Ray Gun @ChrisRGun]

If SpaceX is somehow worth a trillion dollars then Sony should definitely greenlight Destiny 3 because money is obviously fake and the economy is purely theoretical.

[Keith Edwards @keithedwards]

this is so white trash i'm sorry

[Acyn @Acyn]

Cocchiarella: There’s a 100% chance of bugs. That’s a real stat.

So Trump’s acolyte, Dana White, has literally lined the cage with industrial fans to blow the gnats off the fighters.

For this octogenarian’s birthday, the failing, aging king—decaying in real time—has decided to throw himself a giant blood-sport party on the palace lawn to prove that he is still strong. And heaven responds by sending a heat wave, a thunderstorm, and a literal plague of insects down on top of him.

[sarah @sahouraxo]

BREAKING:

Apocalyptic scenes in Lebanon’s capital right now.

Israel is bombing residential buildings in densely populated neighborhoods of Beirut.

A ceasefire that still allows bombs to fall on civilians is not a ceasefire.

[Isaiah Walker @walkeri141]

bro you are arguing with the weather channel reporting the weather

[Hasanabi productions (meme account) @HasanabiProd]

Turns out electing a Muslim socialist isn’t so bad after all

[Kevin Maisto @kevinmaisto]

this is how it’ll be when It Happens

[garlic wife @garlic_wife]

The woke left simply couldn’t handle Dwight’s stapler being suspended in jello in the year of our lord 2026.

[Polling USA @USA_Polling]

With any luck, it'll be his last birthday