maria

not my circus, not my monkeys

[luck @johnwells__]

you stupid fucks complained about a demented 80 year old man being president for 4 years then elected a demented 78 year old man to be president.

[maria @marria_petrella]

Why do Uber drivers not believe in air conditioning

[maria @marria_petrella]

Happy Friday to everyone except people who scream on the metro

[maria @marria_petrella]

Starting the new year by facing my fear of going to the movies alone

[Mike Beauvais @MikeBeauvais]

CNN is cool because for 364 days a year, they’re like “We are at an inflection point for the direction of the world we live in” and then on New Year’s Eve, they’re like “Here’s John Mayer and a cat’s literal asshole with drunk Andy Cohen and Anderson Cooper.”

[maria @marria_petrella]

I love a t shirt toss at a sporting event

[2000s @PopCulture2000s]

the gossip girl thanksgiving episode where everyone got exposed while whatcha say by jason derulo is playing, that’s history.

[maria @marria_petrella]

Wow I love being a woman

[maria @marria_petrella]

If anyone needs me, I’ll be having my annual pre-birthday crisis

[maria @marria_petrella]

Girl dinner? What about girl lunch? I had a Luna bar and a Diet Coke for lunch at work today

[maria @marria_petrella]

If you know me well, you know that I take every chance I have to talk about the Flo Rida concert I went to in Roanoke…and this video checks out

[Pop Base @PopBase]

A baby was crowd-surfed at a Flo Rida concert.

[maria @marria_petrella]

Listening to Speak Now again is truly reminding me of high school and it’s the weirdest feeling

[maria @marria_petrella]

Went to a polo match last weekend and I was SO disappointed that it was nothing like the Britney Spears music video for Radar

[maria @marria_petrella]

Airports are for two things: drinking Bloody Mary’s at the bar and going through your dating app likes

[maria @marria_petrella]

@JellyAnnWiseman Obviously

[maria @marria_petrella]

I’m on trapeze Tik Tok and I am now dying to take a trapeze class…so if anyone in DC wants to go please hit me up lmao

[maria @marria_petrella]

Will someone let me borrow their child for bring your kid to work day? I promise I’ll take care of them

[maria @marria_petrella]

@ my job this is a joke

[maria @marria_petrella]

I hate when I’m busy at work and only have time to watch tik toks once