A 23-year-old woman (married at 20, three years ago) messaged seeking advice after her husband discovered she had gone back to her unmarried 26-year-old ex.
They have a son together, but the child is currently with her alone. She described feeling neglected in the marriage; he was often “busy,” there were frequent misunderstandings, and admitted the affair damaged his trust.
He blocked her on WhatsApp, told her to contact him only about their son, and later said he didn’t want to see her again even after she asked permission to visit.
She says she still loves him, regrets the decision, takes responsibility, and wants to work on herself and possibly try counseling if he ever agrees.
She also disclosed she was raped at 17 by someone else, and her parents are disappointed and ashamed.
In the exchange that followed, she confirmed she is not a graduate (they met while she was learning a skill).
The conversation as it happened:
Àgbà: How old are you?
Her: 23 sir
Àgbà: How old is the marriage?
Her: 3 yrs sir
Àgbà: How old is your husband?
Her: 30 yrs
Àgbà: So he married you when you were 20? Were you a student then? Or are you still a student?
Her: No we meet each other when I was learning a skill
Àgbà: So you're not graduate, correct?
Her: Yes
Àgbà: Is this your ex that you went to cheat with your first? I mean, is he the one that deflowered you?
Her: No his not the one I was raped sir
Àgbà: Raped by who and at what age?
Her: At the age of 17 sir the person was disturbing me then
Àgbà: Okay
What are your parents saying?
Her: They are very disappointed and ashamed of me sir
Àgbà: As expected
How did he find out?
Her: Through my phone
He saw our conversation
Àgbà: How old is your ex? And is he married?
Her: His 26 yrs and is not married
Àgbà: Okay
Unfortunately, your marriage may be over. Who is your son with?
Her: He is with me
Àgbà: Okay
Both of you should plan to coparent in peace. But as for your marriage, it's over. You're still young, and I hope you learn from this. No one can force your estranged husband to take you back. Cheating consequences are not the same for a man and a woman when it gets exposed.
Àgbà: I don't know when you started following me, but I have been warning you young women about this. And reminding you that your worst enemy is your feelings. You allowed it get a hold of you and lost yourself in the process. Now you husband has kicked you out.
Her: Thank you for your advice sir I really appreciate it
What would you have told her?
End.
A 23-year-old woman (married at 20, three years ago) messaged seeking advice after her husband discovered she had gone back to her unmarried 26-year-old ex.
They have a son together, but the child is currently with her alone. She described feeling neglected in the marriage; he was often “busy,” there were frequent misunderstandings, and admitted the affair damaged his trust.
He blocked her on WhatsApp, told her to contact him only about their son, and later said he didn’t want to see her again even after she asked permission to visit.
She says she still loves him, regrets the decision, takes responsibility, and wants to work on herself and possibly try counseling if he ever agrees.
She also disclosed she was raped at 17 by someone else, and her parents are disappointed and ashamed.
In the exchange that followed, she confirmed she is not a graduate (they met while she was learning a skill).
The conversation as it happened:
Àgbà: How old are you?
Her: 23 sir
Àgbà: How old is the marriage?
Her: 3 yrs sir
Àgbà: How old is your husband?
Her: 30 yrs
Àgbà: So he married you when you were 20? Were you a student then? Or are you still a student?
Her: No we meet each other when I was learning a skill
Àgbà: So you're not graduate, correct?
Her: Yes
Àgbà: Is this your ex that you went to cheat with your first? I mean, is he the one that deflowered you?
Her: No his not the one I was raped sir
Àgbà: Raped by who and at what age?
Her: At the age of 17 sir the person was disturbing me then
Àgbà: Okay
What are your parents saying?
Her: They are very disappointed and ashamed of me sir
Àgbà: As expected
How did he find out?
Her: Through my phone
He saw our conversation
Àgbà: How old is your ex? And is he married?
Her: His 26 yrs and is not married
Àgbà: Okay
Unfortunately, your marriage may be over. Who is your son with?
Her: He is with me
Àgbà: Okay
Both of you should plan to coparent in peace. But as for your marriage, it's over. You're still young, and I hope you learn from this. No one can force your estranged husband to take you back. Cheating consequences are not the same for a man and a woman when it gets exposed.
Àgbà: I don't know when you started following me, but I have been warning you young women about this. And reminding you that your worst enemy is your feelings. You allowed it get a hold of you and lost yourself in the process. Now you husband has kicked you out.
Her: Thank you for your advice sir I really appreciate it
What would you have told her?
End.
@GRNasake Chaiii when am I when you posted this???
Well I believe anything can still happen sir, I just need funds to expand my business that's all sir