You know you are learning to set boundaries when you can stand up to toxic behaviours in the family. It can feel isolating but choosing to be treated better regardless of how it feels is a sign of healing.
When people have grown to benefit from your lack of self-care, they will not want you to do different. It creates inconvenience for them. Yep. Even when they love you. Stand up for yourself anyway. Say no anyway. Refuse to hold up their part and yours. It’s not sustainable.