Mary Audrye

No longer 24, but a girl can dream. UNT. Social Work. I'm a literal dog whisperer

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

Nothing is more awkward then getting into an Uber with your gay lover and then asking if you’re friends or siblings. Bitch we lezbeans.

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

When I see @brielarson prospering all I can think of is Kate from United States of Tara

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

I know everyone will say that it will show the dates on later messages but it doesn’t, only the day of the week. I just need dates so i can go back and have accurate notes.

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

Twitter community please help me!! I need to access texts on an old work iphone with a disconnected number. I have access to the phone and the texts but it won’t show any dates for the texts. I need to know the days so i can make case notes.

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

@watermelina May have taught me about queso fresco and Selena but I feel my greatest accomplishment with our multicultural home is making her fall in love with my poodle.

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

@watermelina 😈

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

@watermelina I obviously am not as into this...but when I found Marshal on an island @watermelina asked who it was and I said “idk some grumpy squirrel” lol

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

@bbyphantom Same

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

Also if anyone is hearing Brandon’s rhetoric and wondering why it’s sounds so toxic it’s because it’s called GAS LIGHTING YOU PSYCHO

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

Also is Brandon not also this guy?

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

I’m sorry are Jessica from love is blind and Julia from listen to your heart not the same people?

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

@watermelina @natashaustere Join us Natasha

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

@watermelina I’ve already filed the paperwork

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

@watermelina just saw an electric knife on TV and said she wanted one. She said “what are they called? chicken saws?” In her lovely southern accent, of course.

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

Also @watermelina does this British accent and is over here sounding like Audrey in My Fair Lady

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

Muy sad

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

@watermelina says I can cross off watching the Selena movie from my “dating a Mexican girl list” #bitchicried

[Mary Audrye @mary_aud]

I just asked @watermelina when the Great Depression was and she straight faced said “right now”