Mary Fix

reproductive rights are human rights

she/her/hers

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

If you are 18 then you are a teenager. Yes you are legally an adult. That doesn't change the fact that you are still a TEEN, it is literally in the word eighTEEN.

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

What I could really use is someone to come to my house and bring me to the gym. Give me 5 minutes to put on a bra and then take me to the gym no matter what. It'll be good.

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

If you ask me what's new in my life my mind will immediately go blank

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

Tired of guys neglecting to mention that they have children. What was your plan, for me to never find out you made a person?

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

I'm actually just a clone of my mother

[Karli Drew ♿️ @KarLeia]

Did it hurt when you stopped leaving the house in March 2020, setting your sights on mass vaccinations as the solution, but then people refused to get them “in the name of freedom” while vaccine inequity flourished, so variants kept evolving, & now you’re running low on optimism?

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

The only emails I receive are ads and job rejections

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

If you are working, under absolutely no circumstances can you call a customer "sexy"
I will never go back to that store

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

I think being an adult looks like vacuuming before a friend comes over

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

I put in a time off request more than a month in advance so that that I could have a few days off for my birthday. They literally just said no. And then they pointed out that they aren't required to accommodate all requests. I get paid minimum wage.

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

I feel stuck

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

Do your cats watch you poop as a sort of revenge for when you walked in the room when they were pooping in the litter box? Or do they just come to protect and support you in your time of need...

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

Birds are crazy. Owls and penguins both seem to have these big oval bodies, but under all those feather owls have long legs and penguins have long necks.

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

At work a woman with a mask was counting out cash for me. She picked up a nickel and looked at it. She then proceeded to pull her mask down, lick her thumb, rub the nickel, and then GAVE IT TO ME

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

maybe the reason our cats choose to sleep in cardboard boxes rather than their new cat beds is because they get too warm in their beds, cardboard is a nice way to cool off...

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

Retail is wild. The other day I found a half used cigarette on the floor in the paper crafts aisle. Who and why?

[Mary Fix @mary_fixit]

@hleneeh Stella rosa has a few different flavors but they are all amazing, definitely a sweet way to go but it is my #1 favorite