mathieu platt

We stopped checking for monsters under our bed when we realized they were inside us - the joker

[🐬 @_pauliegee]

today a woman saw me buying flowers for my girlfriend and she said to me "where do i find one like you" and i told her “right here”, because besides being romantic i'm also unfaithful

[mogii এ @yearncel]

Just a little thing called going beast mode

[M @gath3246]

ROFLMFAO

[ACD MMA @acdmma_]

Petr Yan: *breathes*

Merab:

#UFC333

[Mohi @mohithegoat]

No wayy nigga predicted himself getting knocked tf out😭

[MMA On Point @mmaonpoint]

FLYWEIGHTS, MAN!! WHAT A DIVISION!!

[Jozu 🇵🇦 @JozuJoestarr]

coworker i rarely spoke to said “see ya tomorrow” then went home and blew his shit clean off apparently

[rafa @kdicesprimo]

yo traduciendo este tuit

[alfi @ClutchLikeRomo]

$1800 for a console it better crawl under my desk while i play and suck my COCK and BALLS for that much

[Hoodville @Hoodville_]

When you arguing with someone online and see that they lost custody of their kids

[Kincaid ✠︎ ✠︎ @Kincaid14x]

“We have a Rated-R nigger problem.”

[Irish Man 3000 @Frank_Connolly_]

Hearing ''Oh my God he's got a gun'' while holding a gun must feel amazing.

[Jawara @La_Playgirl69]

Hating men enough to want to abort a baby boy but not enough to stop getting fucked raw by them is crazy

[Kaguya’s Top Gal @hayasaka_aryan]

“He doesn’t feel like a hero cause he feels he could’ve saved more kids”

[Weffrey Jellington @jeffwellz]

“So you have mommy issues?”

“My issue is that you’re not my mommy”

[Orion @winesmithing]

"Dear Trump,

If you try to revoke H-1B visas or deport H-1B visa holders in future, we Indians will stop visiting America for tourism and stop using your products and services."

[kij 🗝️ @kijuler]

That south park episode saying there are "Gay people" and then there are "Faggots" and being a fucking faggot isn't about being gay was lowk into something

[Mostly Peaceful Memes @MostlyPeaceful]

Just like we drew it up