Matottisyahu

drunk me needed to stop posting on FB.

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

https://t.co/XnnYQ1FUWR

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

https://t.co/XnnYQ1FUWR

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

https://t.co/UgLKGeToO4

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

Don't tell me that you are "Hardcore" when you literally don't drink,don't drug, and don't sex

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

GameofLife2017: Convincing only yourself that you're not "that drunk" and also getting emotionally attached to random players on @Xbox live

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

ME: idk... I just feel like I've over stayed my welcome..
JARED: ok well that's not how relationships work...

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

I was once told that I couldn't express myself with "cat related material"

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

BIBLE: -# 1: anything from the 2002 Justified album and #2: Anything involving a sassy gay guy...so go watch @bejohnce in@searchpartytbs

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

Maybe there is is perfect world where the zombie apocalypse has already happened and only the people you think matters have survived...

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

No no no! I know what this looks like!..my Snapchat friends are useless and their stories are annoying

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

Just said this to myboyfriend:
" I don't know... baby horses look indignant."

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

While all of you losers daydream about success I'm over here, just naming the 3 cats and 1 dog I don't have yet....

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

"A Bug's Life" is highly underrated. Also, Fuck the movie Ants 🐜

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

Damsel Distressing... P.S. @smileforbrandon thank you for always capturing the quality of being… https://t.co/2JGTXPaLnN

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

"I forgot the name of Count Chocula, so I Had to google Vampire Cereal." #keyskeyskeys #keywest https://t.co/MCZwZk7ti2

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

Work trip to the keys #keyskeyskeys 🔑 https://t.co/NbHUAThBsj

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

Currently at the stage of life where I Netflix and chill while casually googling the next best thing to dedicate my time, life, and Soul to

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

The word: FART is the ugliest word invented...Everyone cares so much about the word "moist" when fart is running rampant with that silent T"

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

You are living in a world where people put their babies on leashes and they're puppies in strollers

[Matottisyahu @Matottusyahu]

@dousleepwalk month 4 of dating my BF I got out of bed, sat on his lap and peed on him.... #romance 🔥🔥