Matthew Benjamin

[GH HILL @GHHILL1911]

I don't know who wrote this originally:

A future soldier time travels into a gun store:
"I need a rifle to kill aliens that are mostly bullet proof."
Ok, you're probably going to want a larger caliber, probably .308, or for armor the added velocity of 6.5 Creed might...
"No, we only have 5.56."
Ok, no problem. You're going to at least want a longer barrel to keep as much velocity as you can.
"I was thinking like, 7 inches."
Ah, ok. If portability is a big concern you're probably going to want a super compact PDW style stock.
"I need the longest, heaviest stock you can find."
...Ok. Lets talk optics then, a 7" 5.56 is gonna be pretty limited on range so a simple red dot...
"I need magnification."
Oh, are these aliens hard to identify?
"They're gigantic."
Oh.
"I tell you what, go ahead and put a red dot at a 45. They look sick."
Will you ever use it?
"I will not."
....so, aliens huh? That sounds rough.
"They have incredibly heightened senses. They can smell blood from a mile away."
OH. Well, now the shorter barrel makes a little more sense. You're making room for a big suppressor.
"A what?"
A silencer. Especially if you're going to be shooting these in close proximity to other people, the concussive forces will be...
"No thanks. We'll probably shoot a dozen of these full auto in a concrete stairwell."
That's...I think you're making my point.
"We'll also be fighting in dimly lit areas."
You'll want a super bright weapon mounted light.
"No I said they'll be dimly lit. What's your dimmest light?"
How is this war going for you?
"We're losing terribly."

[The Fat Electrician @Fat_Electrician]

I like “tacticool” looking backpacks.

Every manufacturer of said product:

“AND HERES 7 SECRET POCKETS FOR YOUR GUN!”

I don’t want a secret pocket for my gun. I just want a fucking backpack. My gun is gunna stay in my waist band pointed at my dick like a normal person.

[Sal the Agorist @SallyMayweather]

Why is it that after every school shooting politicians demand gun control, but when they blow up a school full of 168 little girls no one talks about “missile control”

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

Wrigley is the only character on tell me lies that deserves a happy ending #tellmelies

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

@halseykliri Drink lots of fluid

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

@halseykliri You turned the fan off and lowered the other? Is that why it was so hot in the room last night?

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

@halseykliri Did you wake up at midnight and post this?

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

@halseykliri Bro the other day I had a nightmare I was late to lacrosse practice. I haven’t played lacrosse in 12 years

[InRange TV @InRangeTV]

Assassinations are not self nor community defense.

This country is not at war, and we should *all* strive for it not to be.

Violence begets violence and it is *never acceptable* to instigate it, and is a tragedy when it has to be done in self defense.
It is to be avoided at almost all costs.

While there were contributing factors, an assassin started WW1. WW1 became WW2. That one man with a handgun put some of the most tragic events of the 20th century into a cycle we have to actually escape.
What happened today is unacceptable.
Awful.
Wrong.

We must do better as a society. All of us.

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

@halseykliri Same

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

@MorosKostas They should just bring back the talking filibuster

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

@MorosKostas I feel your pain in MA

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

@sitt_ezra @2Aupdates @MorosKostas Interesting. I didn’t realize there was a process to have those rights restored federally. Thanks for the info!

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

@LetaX @halseykliri @halseykliri you definitely are the officially Mac and cheese queen for both sides of the family after this thanksgiving

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

@halseykliri @SimplyShelbyxo Rude 😂

[Matthew Benjamin @mattben721]

@halseykliri I’m sorry love