Matt

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@GreatCheshire Paddington?

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@KatieBurnett At what point would it be more efficient for this guy to get 'bellend' tsttooed on his forehead

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@AllisonRFloyd

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@jemmaforte Liz Truss looking like she just clapped eyes on The One Ring

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@inthefade

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@JimMFelton "Dear Slim, I wrote you but you still aint callin' "

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@hankgreen Zap stuff.

Find a thing and then zap it.

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@BeckyBunzy https://t.co/tu452ZoAlF

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@AllisonRFloyd Not long now...

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@whatrosasaid Well... was it correct?

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@blakemon1

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@sammynickalls Wait, Venmo shows a list of other people's transactions? Why is that a thing? Bloody apps

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@GreatCheshire @ScottNiswander The home of mandoms

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@hankgreen This coffee is 'ot, but I am otter

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@GreatCheshire Huge if true

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@vornietom Derrz bin a moidah in New Yoik

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@novelarnia It is better. She'd traded up for a few hours

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@novelarnia Did you give the dog a temp name?

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@sammynickalls "This term describes a recent feline"

'What's 'new pussycat'?"

John looks at the camera and smirks

[Matt @matthewjohn1212]

@CamillaCleese Mine does the opposite and converts to UK.
I get so angry with it, especially when im on my full stop.