MJ Rippon

Wait... what?

[Dr. Tom Frieden @DrTomFrieden]

An mRNA vaccine doesn't actually contain the virus itself. Think of it as an email sent to your immune system that shows what the virus looks like, instructions to kill it, and then—like a Snapchat message—it disappears. Amazing technology.

[Hannah Rose Woods @hannahrosewoods]

Edward Elgar, on not being able to sing Land of Hope and Glory in 1918. For anyone who’s currently taking pleasure in imagining themselves fighting a culture war for patriotism

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

Happy birthday #Bahamas !#IndependenceDay 🇧🇸

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

TCP reports rocketing US sales as Republicans rush to inject themselves with disinfectant. In other news, Democrats predict rapidly changing demographics may strongly favour Biden in November...

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

Happy Earth Day! I can’t help but think that the earth is messing with us - sending us (1) a glorious spring and (2) a virus so terrifying we have to stay indoors.

[Kirstie Allsopp @KirstieMAllsopp]

No, there’s a ban on working class house hunters. I come out in a rash if exposed to them.

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

TGLJHHI learning a one-finger version of Beethoven’s ‘Ode to Joy’ for tomorrow night 🙄 Teenage children’s reaction best described as 🙉😫 #lockdown @wittertainment

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

@andy_brown4430 Somebody beat me to it 😀

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

@herbkim @eonenergyuk @octopus_energy Temporarily with British Gas at the moment but will be switching again in the summer I expect!

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

Oh, and do you know what the worst thing is? We were customers of @eonenergyuk for more than 16 years. And this is how they treated us. Loyalty counts for nothing. Nothing.

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

Initially @eonenergyuk agreed to settle our bank charges and interest but now have retracted that, offering just £10 as gesture of goodwill and nothing for the massive distress and inconvenience we suffered whilst in the middle of mortgage applications. #stunned #avoid 2/2

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

One morning in late October, I woke up to find that @eonenergyuk had helped itself to over £5000 from our account. No bill, no warning, nothing, plunging us £4000 over our overdraft limit. Turns out they overcharged us by >£2k! 1/2

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

I think we may need to build an ark...

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

@MichaelVaughan “Unbelievable”. Best @netflix production of 2019. No question.

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

Two down, four to go. #RIPTerryJones

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

When you move house and you find that you’ve probably acquired more of something than you could ever need...

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

@bbclaurak Had the Brexit party not stood in Sunderland, would its 3 seats have turned blue tonight? Seems impossible to believe but all three had Labour majorities of ~3k with the Brexit party taking ~5k... 🤔

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

While #konmari ing my clothes: “What’s this music, son? Why, RunDMC! 💪 Oh, the previous one? Er... well... yes, that was *whispers* Gloria Estefan” 😬🙈 #credibilityfailure

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

@KFC_UKI there’s a bug in your website. You can’t “proceed to payment” if you choose to join the Colonel’s Club. Also, there’s a typo in the word “delivery”.

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

@MORETHAN Even the if you are hit at a junction by a driver who is stoned. That says all anybody needs to know about insurers.

[MJ Rippon @matthewrippon]

Getting quotes for car insurance. Forgot I was rammed by a stoned driver at a roundabout last year. Totally not my fault, amended my details. Best quote previously was from @MORETHAN - they raised it by 15%. WTF are you supposed to do? And insurers wonder why they are hated 😡