Neuron Activator

[Blake ™ @NeilNevins]

(Austin Powers game tutorial level)

Austin: Wait a tick. When’s the last time I opened my shag bag?

Basil: Good thinking, Austin! Why not press ⭕️ and check your inventory?

Austin: I do pride myself in pressing the right buttons, don’t I? YEAH, BABY.

[Minnesota Timberwolves @Timberwolves]

thank you for everything, Joe 💙

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

You are a disgrace to our state. Dickhead.

[Pete Stauber @RepPeteStauber]

BREAKING: A major victory for America and Minnesota’s 8th Congressional District was secured today.

The Senate just passed my bill to reverse Biden’s illegal mining ban in the Superior National Forest – it’s now headed to the President’s desk!

Mining is our past, our present, and our future – and the future looks bright!

[Andrew Rousso @AndrewRousso]

when two vagueposters meet

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

Buffalo Wild Wings :)

[SleeperVikings @SleeperVikings]

Where were you watching the Minneapolis Miracle eight years ago today?

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

30 minutes into the naked gun and the gf doesn’t laugh until “Mr. Papschmear”

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

Rip Ozzy 😞

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

@theymergirl Doxylamine 👍

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

Murderer Test: I identified murderers correctly 86.67% of the time. https://t.co/rJLgoacn1x via @idr_labs

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

Pretty sure I have a hernia at 24. Quarter life crisis: catalyzed

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

I write down why students lost points in their infinite campus grade book and I just had my first student hit the character limit. Sorry mom and dad, you’ll have to take my word for it that your kid does absolutely nothing every day

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

@ourladyofbruh 😇

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

I fell asleep eating a nutty bar and it looks like I shit the bed

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

Lots of people who like dead kennedys for the wrong reasons in this comment section

[Dead Kennedys @DeadKennedys]

If anyone is coming to our last 2 sold
Out shows in Philly and DC, we will still have these shirts in stock. They are selling fast! Thanks to Mr Firley for the design.

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

Fuck my shit ass life!

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

I think I’ve heard one million sounds today

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

John Pork

[Steven Cheung @StevenCheung47]

A relic of the past found in a random cabinet in the White House.

Apparently @jrpsaki was soooooo important she had personalized note cards made to remind people how “important” she was.

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

I’m getting let go from my job at the end of the year. C’est la vie. I think I’ll become a carpenter instead 💪

[fixmyface @putridstu]

VOLCANO “NO WAY BACK” OUT NOW!

Pre-Order Merch:
https://t.co/a0r5u3X93V

[Neuron Activator @matthewsername]

Didn’t realize how dependent I am on milk until I skipped school lunch. I had the shakes man, I was throwing back shots of 2% as soon as I got home