Matt Schmitz

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

@hunxhoszn Cmon man

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

@1wickedwick Is it the algorithm orrrrrrrr

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

@utahhjaz @utahjazx Baca?

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

Nooo I’m literally ill haha

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

Not that complex, eh?

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

I been around on this here app 🤣🥳

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

Also, this is why bars close at 2 am

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

Looking for trouble lol

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

Honestly thank god I never played a sport and was never very athletic to be good at the sports because I was able to grow and evolve with life and not live in my “glory days” lol. Why are you 42 talking about your college football career?

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

I wish people would just admit they’re taking semaglutide or tirzepatide, because after losing 60+ lbs on it, I know the signs lol. Babe you (we) have been fat all your life, and now you found the diet and regimen? Yeah, a monthly subscription to GLP-1s.

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

Oh no I haven’t changed

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

I gotta stop fucking around with straight guys. They get me turned upside down quicker than most lol

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

Most of my friends, and myself now, are in therapy. What’s gonna happen when we’re healed? Seems boring.

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

Please somebody fucking sedate me

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

Running out of gas couldn’t scream “I’m irresponsible” any louder and that just happened to me

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

The first time I heard someone say the word ‘serendipity’ I said, out loud “Who’s Sara and Dippity?” and I do think that’s on me.

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

No, you know what? Good, bitch.

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

I have it together enough where I’ve never had to email IT because I didn’t change my password in time

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

I do be waiting for bravo to cast me. Who else do you know that got Botox at the bar!?

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

Idk what people fucking want from me..

[Matt Schmitz @mattschmitzz2]

Lmfao fixed this crisis by getting drunk and got Botox at the bar lmfao