mattt.

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

In trouble with work for not showing up? Get steaming with your boss it'll work wonders!

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

Nice climb up to 2nd in the table for us tonight:)

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

Who the fuck told me it was a good idea to buy a double scotch on the rocks for $26!!!!! Don't even like scotch ffs

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

I need grease!!!

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

@BillyReid11 @TheLadBible 😂😂😂😂

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

Anyone awaiting results with optimism I left my exam thinking I could potentially get an A cause of a low grade boundary I got a U and 17%😊

[Justin Forsett @JForsett]

On our way to Philly!

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

Bet the people who are behind these accounts are 18yo and live off their parents with no job though https://t.co/dXIA9eeAGS

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

Having a joint whilst waiting for the boys to come for a joint before heading to an all you can eat Mexican joint, sa-weeeeeeet

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

Damn nigga if you a girl and a group of boys say we're having a boys night, you don't insist on coming and basically follow me home

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

Pints, pingas and pussy, welcome to oz @BillyReid11

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

@BillyReid11 most casual tweet ever

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

3 wickets in 8 balls how even does that happen

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

so you break up with me & get mad that I fucked someone else then fuck me again and get mad cause I got mad cause you fucked me over? Girls

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

Fucking love waking up to a payrise who knew my boss was nice

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

There's noone I miss more than my brother, and there's noone I fought with more than my brother, logic?

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

The Australian commentary on the football is so bad it's funny

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

Love waking up and not knowing who the fucks in my bed😂😂😂

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

Been listening to the commentary too much haha #glorious

[mattt. @matttballantyne]

I'm being paid to watch the cricket and it's absolutely glorious