•

“Woman on top.”

[• @mawzzy]

if you're not ok with pepperoni then i'm not ok with you! *runs to cry in his pillow*

[• @mawzzy]

@muffinmoonx My loins have submitted a request for peer review.

[• @mawzzy]

@muffinmoonx Yes, I can picture it now. Moonie in a purpose-built hermitage with a rockery, offering the occasional sage advice, irreverent entertainment, and a fair amount of mouth clicks.

[• @mawzzy]

@STYNCLSY Have you ascended to a higher realm of consciousness? The sparkle emoji is you and the side eyes are all the mortals in awe of your ethereal effervescence.

[• @mawzzy]

@TheDadCamp If I disappear, tell the authorities the Chaise Mafia has my blood on their bouclé.

[• @mawzzy]

@muffinmoonx Hope you feel better soon, Moonie.

[• @mawzzy]

@muffinmoonx The morning paper said there’ll be a full muffin moon Saturday night.

[• @mawzzy]

@muffinmoonx Aren’t we all hunting for our external screens?

[• @mawzzy]

@TheDadCamp NOTICE: second sweater IS closer than it appears.

[• @mawzzy]

@muffinmoonx Wait, you can see us?

[• @mawzzy]

@muffinmoonx It’s giving Vera Post-Modern Medieval Black Forest Wang and I’m here for it.

[• @mawzzy]

@muffinmoonx I-I-I-I’m st-st-str-stra- I’m like SO STRAIGHT!!!

[• @mawzzy]

@TheDadCamp My eye is on that weird surprise.

[• @mawzzy]

@TheDadCamp Hello, nude. Welcome to planet Earth.

[• @mawzzy]

@TheDadCamp Anyone worth their salt would come for the mustard before the mayonnaise.

[• @mawzzy]

@STYNCLSY Hi. https://t.co/JzLuGIBq04

[• @mawzzy]

@TheDadCamp Plausible! (Yours)

[• @mawzzy]

@clementine_cro Thankfully, they haven’t invented soap that’ll cleanse a filthy mind.

[• @mawzzy]

@clementine_cro Un—be—lievable. I have to avenge your death again. Close all your open tabs again. And erase your Tweens apps AGAIN!