Corey Maxey

Things I say that my wife thinks the world should know.

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

If I die remember this: you can’t trust anyone! Except our moms.

#Moms are the only people you can trust in this world.

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

Steve should really be getting closure with Blue- he’s the one who was hurt the most! There’s nothing like a relationship between a man and his dog. #BluesClues25 #SteveBurns

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

Farts are like children. You never know how it’s going to come out.

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

I know my wife is really into me when she gets all Vampirey 🥰 🦇

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

Tacos for dinner means Cinnarioles for dessert... that’s a cinnamon roll but in Spanish 🇲🇽 #beans #cinnamonrolls

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

I like when people say I can’t do things. It fuels me.
##motivationmonday

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

My wife’s hair is like another person who lives with us....
Hairietta.
#wife #hair #married #longhair #latinas

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

That was a good burger. I hope I burp later so I can taste it again.

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

Our House: My wife sees it as a nest. I see it as a fortress 🏰

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

When I get to be me, I’m happier

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

@FallonTix I want tickets! My NBC app is not helping

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

Mom: you have a lot of crap in my garage.

Me: C.R.A.P. Corey’s Really Awesome Possessions 😎

#iwin

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

:Stop touching my mole

Wife: i want to! And I will!

: Did YOU grow it?! 🌿

Wife: 😳

[Corey Maxey @maxey_corey]

I used to read and jog... theses days life is different.