maya

slut 4 ur mom

[maya @may_a359]

nearly dropped a hot pizza on a customer today, but at least i’m not a busser anymore🥳🥳

[maya @may_a359]

right after the new manicure. was too embarrassed to go back in and have them fix it💔

[maya @may_a359]

today we are grieving the loss of paul and his other three fishy friends. you will be missed💔💔

[maya @may_a359]

donate to planned parenthood 4 a booty pic (need proof)😋😋

[maya @may_a359]

just won 7 fish at the fair, does anyone want a free fish? you will be saving the fishy from a sad fate of being flushed down the toilet.

[maya @may_a359]

impulsively spent $300 on headphones and now amazon won’t let me return them. you win some you lose some. i’ve accepted my defeat.

[maya @may_a359]

i hope you fall off the ferris wheel🫶

[maya @may_a359]

came home from my trip to a dead string of pearls. want to die.

[maya @may_a359]

didn’t have the heart to tell my nail dude they were hideous so i paid my $100, tipped $20, then cried in the parking lot for 30min.

[maya @may_a359]

why did i wait until the very last day of school to finish all my missing assignments

[maya @may_a359]

@isa03300483 this is coming from a racist

[maya @may_a359]

@WissmanMolly12 except blake lively, she is the met gala

[maya @may_a359]

just found $20 in my jean pocket. no longer worried about my ap psych test because clearly gods on my side today

[maya @may_a359]

@allieonline3 do it

[maya @may_a359]

dropped my whole container of sushi. day ruined.

[maya @may_a359]

some people really need to be hit you know, like a good punch in the face

[maya @may_a359]

@wallyblivin you’re selling this membership thing better than the lady who talked my ear off for 30min yesterday trying to get me to join, i think i will tho after seeing this tweet.

[maya @may_a359]

@versacekookies pls do u have nothing better to do😐

[maya @may_a359]

women❤️😋