melissa 🍂

🍑

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

Last night I had a dream where I unknowingly ate dinner with a cannibal family and then at the end I found out I was eating people the whole time and then they invited me back again next week and I said yes ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

Super awkward middle school me would have really appreciated it if thick eyebrows and freckles were considered cool back in '05.

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

Saw this yesterday and haven't stopped thinking about it. You're welcome. (sound on)

[📟🌐 TRÉ VAYNE, INC. 🌐📟 @trevaynebitch]

This aggressively country child DEMANDING to pet this dog is sending me

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

I have 4 large rolls of toilet paper in my apartment and this could easily get me through an entire month of quarantine....

[Tea with Tolkien @TeawithTolkien]

good things to do while home quarantined:

- read Lord of the Rings
- watch Lord of the Rings
- listen to Lord of the Rings soundtrack
- think about Lord of the Rings
- tweet about Lord of the Rings

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

First Monday of quarantine. Really getting to know my bird neighbors. This lovely couple is by far my favorite.

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

This is my new favorite bird. Look at this fabulous boy wow

[𝒸𝑜𝓊𝓇𝓉 ☁️☁️☁️ @CourtneyNoir]

the white-browed tit-warbler

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

I only know how to spell glamorous because of Fergie.

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

Me: oh boy am I tired. Can’t wait to sleep!
My anxiety:

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

@pclaroni This is extremely smart of you. I just started doing this recently and it really helps with work related anxiety.

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

For #2020 I recommend turning off email notifications on your phone. I'm not saying don't check your email. Im saying check it on your own terms. Try it. Be free.

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

Wait, everyone has changed in the past 10 yrs?? You aren't the same as you were in 2009!?

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

Omg I can't believe it was a giant blue dildo in the case the whole time. Best plot twist ever #WatchmanHBO

[jorts 🇵🇸 @ftmensch]

is someone forcing you guys to post your spotify things

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

Hot take: ketchup is mediocre at best

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

Every year I am completely unsurprised by my top 5 Spotify artists because every year I have like 5 albums on repeat and listen to pretty much no other music. There are 2 reasons for this. 1: I obsess over albums and am bad at listening to new things. 2: Podcasts. So many podcast

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

Not to be dramatic but I don't think I will ever stop thinking about baby yoda #TheMandalorian

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

My goal is to look at least vaguely mystical at all times

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

I was just trying to text the word duck and it autocorrected it to fuck. How the tables have turned.

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

Yall are sleeping on @darkcrystal. I watched it over a month ago at this point and I still think about it.

[melissa 🍂 @mconner07]

This year's November full moon will be taking place on my birthday so I fully expect it to be a weird one. 🌝♏️