meg

oh, mirror in the sky… // #BadFork

[Matt Margolis @ItsMattsLaw]

Aliens (completely bewildered): so the groundhog

Me: is clairvoyant, yes

[IT WAS NEVER GOING TO BE ME @solomonmissouri]

same guy

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

This is Carl. He was just woken up from a nap. Hopes for your sake the house is on fire. 12/10

[Brad Hargreaves @bhargreaves]

My favorite thing about this chart is that the median homebuyer age rose from 39 in 2005 to 59 in 2025

20 years over 20 years

It’s literally the same people buying the homes two decades later

[The Antihero @YourBoy_KG]

Are the developers at Outlook happy with their search function?

[Jessica Tarlov @JessicaTarlov]

Nothing says government efficiency more than having to spend resources chasing down employees you never meant to fire. 🫣

[🍃 @cardamomkiss]

It's always something with him

[Mac @GoodPoliticGuy]

nothing conservatives hate more than the actual teachings of Jesus

[emily may @emilykmay]

"men just don't care about those things" and it's just a list of all of the little things that weave together the social fabric of society, and then we wonder out loud why men are lonely.

[Bryan Johnson Blood Boy #37 @bryanbloodboy37]

Me: (breathlessly lurching out of a time machine landed in 2007) we have to stop the host of fear factor from helping the host of the apprentice seize power in 2016!

Literally anyone in 2007: you're kinda fat to be talking to me???

[tori @tdubbzholla]

you’ll never guess who he is referring to here

[Nicole Nichelle @alamanecer]

how your email finds me 😂

[Claude @508mph]

What my early morning work commute feels like when it’s below 50°

[Women Posting W's @womenpostingws]

she's literally just a girl

[Four Seasons Total Landscaping @TotalSeasons]

We’d like to announce that while we are not a hotel, we are a concept of a hotel.

[Taurus Groove @jiggyjayy2]

Nobody

Jesse McCartney in 2004:

[Nature is Amazing ☘️ @AMAZlNGNATURE]

Butterflies will sometimes land on a Caiman and drink its salty, crocodile tears to in order to survive. This helps the Caiman to feel both less sad and more fabulous.