Mean Blonde Barbie

You're ugly.

[🏴 @Lewis_Fitz22]

Can't wait to get absolutely Demi Lovato'd this Saturday

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

You’re only young once but you can be immature forever

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

I don’t like the person I become when I’m overheated

[Hell On Heels @HellOnHeelsGirl]

Sorry been extremely busy weeknight partying

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

I just want to confirm that you’ve definitely been telling everyone that thing I told you not to tell anyone

[Ꮍᴀᴇʟ @elle91]

[At a bar]
Guy: Did it hurt?
Me: What?
G: When you fell walking in. I saw you fall on your face. Everyone saw.

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

Always stick around for one more drink. That’s when things happen.

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

If they are still ugly after 7 drinks, it’s time to give up.

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

Vodka can be mixed with anything. Including more vodka.

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

Once upon a time, a man asked a girl to marry him, the girl said “no!” And she lived happily ever after, and went shopping, dancing and drinking. She always had a clean house, never cooked and looked fabulous all the time. The end.

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

4)WHATEVER- a woman’s way of saying screw you
5)THATS OKAY- she’s thinking long and hard on how and when you will pay for your mistake

BONUS WORD-WOW
This is not a compliment. She’s amazed that one person could be so stupid.

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

5 deadly terms used by women (thread)
1) FINE- this is the word women use to end an argument when she knows she is right and you need to shut up
2)NOTHING- means something & you need to be worried
3)GO AHEAD- this is a dare, not permission, do not do it.

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

My top 5 exercises:

1) jumping to conclusions
2) flying off the handle
3) carrying things too far
4) dodging responsibilities
5) pushing my luck

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

What if rappers rapped about nice things? Like, “girl I’m gonna take your clothes off.. and hang them neatly in the closet, yeahhh”

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

I hate everyone. And pants.

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

Let’s drink a couple bottles of wine, watch the real housewives, and just tell everyone we went to yoga.

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

It appears we’re at that place in our relationship where you’ve discovered that I’m bat shit crazy.

[Mean Blonde Barbie @meaniebarbie]

I’m not the cat lady type. I’m more like the actual cat. I want affection when I want it and on my terms. The rest of the time I want to claw out your eyes and piss in your shoe.