Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole

It’s hyphenated because I married a Butthole. I’m a butthole by marriage

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

@jen_pilot It’s my new favorite song rn!

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

Is it just me or anyone else always get the goldfish that couldn’t pinch off a turd, and it just swam around with shit hanging off of it?

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

I never wanted to be this person, but when I order a Diet Coke and the server asks if Pepsi is ok, I always say sure, because I want to be an easygoing patron. The truth is it isn’t. It’s never going to be ok. I say it is, because I am ashamed of having a preference.

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

I irrationally despise my Roomba. The only reason I haven’t put it outside and set it free, is my husband would miss it.

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

@jen_pilot “Downtown” Macklemore over here

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

@Phil_Sledge

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

@jen_pilot Well what were the DNA results Maury?

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

@DateDateline A knight with a pocket square. What a gentleman.

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

The only thing hard around here is feelings.

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

@jen_pilot Actually, as I am immersed in the Vanderpump Bravoverse, I must give credit where credit is due, @LisaVanderpump said it first.

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

Remember parochial prom kids “He decided to sit this one out” is an unacceptable answer when reminded to leave room for the Holy Spirit.

[Animation Domination @AniDom]

relationship goals

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

Here’s a quarter, call someone who cares

[Travis Tritt @TravisTritt]

I will be deleting all Anheuser-Busch products from my tour hospitality rider. I know many other artists who are doing the same.

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

When you go to the drugstore (dispensary) you earn purchase points. It’d be a lot cooler if they called them “toke”ns

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

Celebrity crushes are are so funny. My friend shared with me her love of America’s Daddy, Pedro Pascal and I said I think I like him more as a friend.

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

When Goodbye Earl by The Chicks came out it was really controversial. I worked in radio at the time and stations wouldn’t play it. I don’t condone violence but I still get chills thinking of Mary Ann boarding that red eye.

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

Are the same people banning drag shows aware kids play with Ken dolls that have a tight tuck?

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

@jen_pilot I knew I wasn’t alone!

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

Ever wonder if Herman Muenster was a Frankenstein Monster, who’s dong was sewn on him? It had to be a good one to catch a stone cold fox like like Lily.

[Yolanda Tokyo-Butthole @medusaismymuse]

My dog Max is part Pit Bull, Alaskan Malamute, and Labrador. People always mistake him for a Lab. I say you’re close, he’s a Meth Lab.