MJ

philly

[MJ @MeeeshJ]

When my mom asks me how dating is going I’m just going to show her this

[larry davids mistress @b1gdumb1diott]

@Maced_God We’ve hooked up before so what we’re not gonna do is try to troll me on my profile where you don’t follow me. Have a good thanksgiving cole!

[larry davids mistress @b1gdumb1diott]

I love coming home for the holidays because the best bathroom for lighting is my brothers with these permanent glow in the dark planet stickers on the mirror that have been there since 2007

[Isabel Steckel @IsabelSteckel]

men will always fascinate me

[phage @clubmoss_]

Women will “no, exactly” each other into a parallel universe

[molly @molllllusk]

I miss four weddings. I miss four strangers with the ugliest weddings you’ve ever seen judging the living crap out of each other. nothing else on tv like it.

[Nicole Pomarico @nicolepomarico]

Taylor Lautner is the only one doing celebrity right. Take the money from your giant franchise and enjoy your quiet and unproblematic life. Marry a nice person with the same name as you. Practice your backflips in obscurity until Taylor Swift asks to see you.

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

why is hiring movers so awkward for me like I am paying these very nice men to lift heavy furniture, something I am completely unable to do, but I feel like an asshole for not carrying my couch myself???

[Harry Hill @veryharryhill]

Do you think they’re playing Never Have I Ever in the submarine rn

[bear @iamblackbear]

no mommy issues
no daddy issues

bitch im the issue

[Benny Johnson @bennyjohnson]

Step 1:

[abby @_ayshaw]

@MeeeshJ Meesh everything you do is dramatic