Megan

i promise you, I’m hearing a tik tok audio, right now.

[Megan @meg_blitz]

“Oh look it’s little miss forgot to eat until 5pm” 🙃 it would have been less hurtful if it weren’t true…

[Megan @meg_blitz]

@nick_advocate @SequinedCow Queen status Miss Esquire!!!

[Megan @meg_blitz]

Getting my Taco Bell order and having every aspect of it be wrong showed me the thread my sanity was hanging from was actually very thin

[Megan @meg_blitz]

“You look like a movie star from a movie no one has seen yet” the homeless man outside my office this morning who has now given me my favorite compliment

[Megan @meg_blitz]

It was number three on my recommended searches..

[Megan @meg_blitz]

The fact that I know if I get on tik tok, the internet has likely already found the two women who fat shamed a couple at a Luke Combs concert in Minn. last night and I don’t know if I want to be that scared or impressed right now

[Megan @meg_blitz]

“Hey! Having some people over for a Friday night hang?” My neighbor in response to me just now pulling a large bottle of vodka out of my backseat for an evening of just me, “yeah something like that”

[Megan @meg_blitz]

Picking little arguments with the people who are assholes to chipotle workers is my weird favorite thing, like yes Karen be shitty to me and leave the minimum wage food service worker alone I’m why they are out of chips

[Megan @meg_blitz]

The lovely woman at an Indian restaurant near me knows me by order and calls me “Meggie” 🥹 she deserves the world

[Megan @meg_blitz]

My buddy’s stream ♥️ if you’re looking for a new obsession

[Megan @meg_blitz]

@ooliviamo AS YOU SHOULD 💛🎉

[Megan @meg_blitz]

Day I’ve lost count of looking for a plot in #BBCMerlin that isn’t just them flirting with each other

[Megan @meg_blitz]

@tayl0r9 And if they give you shit lemme know I know the manager at that location

[Megan @meg_blitz]

@tayl0r9 If it’s PF you can go ask the front desk to tel them to stop we aren’t supposed to film in there

[Megan @meg_blitz]

This show is legitimately just 100 ways to gaslight Arthur pendragon and the fact that he’s just a dumb little himbo trying his best makes this so good

[Megan @meg_blitz]

Fine TikTok fine, I’ll watch BBC’s Merlin

[Megan @meg_blitz]

@hannahmarie4201 Still waiting on an explanation for why Arthur went charging off to find the antidote for Merlin’s poison that is not that they are dating

[Megan @meg_blitz]

@hannahmarie4201 Also I have found 0 hetero explanations for this dynamic 😂

[Megan @meg_blitz]

@CKolbmann I’m eternally grateful for this privilege and honor 💛

[Megan @meg_blitz]

This tweet is for the man at the Sabres game who I forever changed with the information that not only can cats have herpes, but also can lose an eye because of it. I’m sure you’ll never forget that interaction and I’d just like to apologize, idk why I am this way 😂