Megan Fischer

TX - CA

[Jenny Johnson @JennyJohnsonHi5]

I wish there was a way for the wildfires to leave the homes alone, but burn these fucking scooters that are all over Los Angeles.

[Danny @doglab]

Man Who Saved 669 Children During The Holocaust Has No Idea They’re Around Him On Live Television Show. https://t.co/YXXNglEkAN #RemembranceDay2018

[Breaking News @BreakingNews]

World UFC champion Rhonda Rousey suffers shock loss in knockout by Holly Holm - @newscomauHQ https://t.co/jOiw3XIDvX

[Pepperdine University @pepperdine]

Hey there! We actually use 100% reclaimed water & have since '72. Check out more: http://t.co/x8oZdfGmrL #CADrought https://t.co/oWmtjatFcr

[Breaking News @BreakingNews]

Mayor announces Google Fiber is coming to San Antonio, Texas; city expects 100x faster Internet speeds - @KENS5 http://t.co/uz2ADWUe8o

[Breaking News @BreakingNews]

Ronda Rousey defeats Bethe Correia by knockout to retain UFC Women's Bantamweight Championship - @SportsCenter http://t.co/BqLjYyJmr5

[Megan Fischer @Megs23]

Ppl my age talking abt being excited 2 go home & watch a movie w/ their baby. I'm vomiting from a migraine & pretty sure I'm having more fun

[Megan Fischer @Megs23]

I love getting told I look like a celebrity when all we have in common is that we're mildly overweight white girls #WereNotAllTheSame

[Megan Fischer @Megs23]

When you're trying to figure out why your boss is extra assholey today. Ps it is.

[Megan Fischer @Megs23]

@TheComedyStore thanks!

[Megan Fischer @Megs23]

@TheComedyStore is it the same deal for the main room tonight?

[Texas Humor @TexasHumor]

Dear California,

Please take note.

Signed,
Us Crowded Texans

[Megan Fischer @Megs23]

@OITNB Ain't no party like a prison party #OnWednesdaysWeWearOrange #OrangeCon #Vauseman

[Chelsea Handler @chelseahandler]

Here's Why I Am My Mother's Daughter @HuffPostBlog http://t.co/kjAWr64kFZ via @HuffPostWomen

[Megan Fischer @Megs23]

Freeways are dangerous bc they consist of BMWs that are pissed off Trader Joe's ran out of their favorite organic gluten free kale chips

[Megan Fischer @Megs23]

@carlyaquilino yeah. people who steal @JennyJohnsonHi5 jokes.

[Megan Fischer @Megs23]

@TruthAndIliza thanks. I was so worried I would have to focus on work.

[Megan Fischer @Megs23]

@TruthAndIliza THE LINKS ARE NOT WORKING. HOW AM I GOING TO MAKE IT THOUGH WORK NOW

[Megan Fischer @Megs23]

Idk if I should finish my Hitler doc on Netflix or watch Taken. I also don't know if that makes me a psycho or a lonely post grad. #SatNight