melissa

rock on 🤘🏻

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

@emily_macarthur HAHAHAHH

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

Probably going to get arrested for searching for “teeth” on Facebook Marketplace this morning 🤷🏼‍♀️

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

I guess I forgot that doing my laundry means I’ll have clean underwear and will stop having to go around commando 🤷🏼‍♀️

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

When you’re talking to someone on tinder and find out they make Tik Tok videos 😐

[Trixie Mattel™ @trixiemattel]

I’m happy to report that for me every single day is #LesbianDayOfVisibility

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

Changed my tinder settings to “men and women” when I was bored last night and I have never been so entertained in my life #wastehistime2019

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

@emily_macarthur 😂😂😂

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

I’m fried and there are chicken nuggets in the oven

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

@emily_macarthur Urban Decay setting spray

[feminist next door @emrazz]

I’ll believe it’s a scary time for men the day fathers regularly teach their sons that if they’re attacked, they should scratch the perpetrator so that if they die at least we’ll have the killer’s DNA.

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

Sometimes I truly think that the reason I’ve stayed alive this long is because I don’t trust anyone else to take care of my cats.

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

Remember when I owned a home and I could smoke on my back deck in my underwear? I definitely took that for granted, honey, cause now that I live in an apartment, that ain’t an option 🙄🙄

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

Jess just threw a fart bomb firework in the bathroom while I was in the tub. COOL. LOVE MY LIFE.

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

Ever since I was diagnosed with BPD last week, I’ve been reading about it a lot and a lot of the things I read about people with BPD are the things I hate most about myself. This is a really fucked up feeling.

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

I’d do some pretty fucked up things for some hospital apple juice right now.

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

“You didn’t even take my vagina’s feelings into consideration.” - Me

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

Jess to the cats before she leaves: WHO WANTS CATNIP?!

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

“I ain’t a bootcut kinda gal.” - Bae

[melissa @melissa_macabre]

Jess looking at shoes: they don’t have a single nice pair.