Melissa Ashraf

bravo & puppies. that’s all I need

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

Gretchen immediately lying about having no plastic surgery is the level of delulu I aspire to be #RHOC

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

Holidays are fun until you are old enough to host and realize how expensive it is, you have to clean your entire house and every grocery store thanksgiving week is pure hell….

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

wrapping presents may be the worst part of Christmas 😑

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

@jmancini44 You good?

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

who knew that acorns could be my worst enemy. 😩😩😩

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

Carmelized onion dip from Trader Joe’s — that’s it, that’s the tweet

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

I don’t care how much you love someone, listening to them snore will always make you want to gouge their eyes out

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

August 2021 is starting to feel a whole lot like March 2020 and I’m gunna need the world to calm the F down.

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

Why did no one ever tell us that growing up also came with an extreme case of acid reflux?

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

Most women who are about to turn 31 would be sending their boyfriends engagement rings for their birthday, I’m sending mine puppies

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

Tuesday after MDW is always the mondayest Monday there ever was

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

Best part of MDW used to be Parker house basement, this MDW the best part is going to be seeing my dog

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

Sunday of MDW and I am on the couch watching movies all day, have I officially grown up? Or am I just old.

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

Me - “I’m not really going to clean too much just a little”
Also me - on the floor scrubbing every inch of the kitchen

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

before 9am I had watched RHONJ, gone to dunkin, shoprite & Trader Joe’s. Adulting at its finest. Now I have to work though and I really would rather not

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

Just when you think @carrieunderwood can’t get more perfect she straight comes out like an angel.

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

Really tried to be a girl who could wear a colorful dress but here I am resorting back to black like the basic bitch I am

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

When I die - bury me in vodka sauce.

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

My dogs are still sleeping at 9am - if reincarnation is really please let me come back as a dog because that’s the life.

[Melissa Ashraf @melissaashraf]

painted my nails last night and I’m truly proud of how good they look however I have anxiety because I know they will chip within the next 24 hours so just waiting for that to ruin my day.