People who spend long periods of time at home and slowly lose the desire to go outside often think they're just resting. But psychologically, many of them are experiencing something called mental rumination. It's a state where the brain starts slowing down while the number of thoughts inside keeps increasing and the motivation to do anything slowly disappears. The mind gets stuck in the past, worries about the future and burns itself out. This isn't laziness, it's a nervous system stuck in survival mode. And the longer it lasts, the more distant normal life begins to feel. And the difficult part is that you usually can't escape it through one massive burst of motivation. And sometimes,recovery starts with just one small step.
i hate hate HATE that i require so much reassurance like things could be going perfectly fine but there's always a part of me that believes that all of it is a lie
if you wanna be happy you literally cannot cannot cannot cannottttttt care what people thinkโฆ like you have to practice that daily.. and stay grounded in that. long as you not hurting or hindering nobody do what you want & be unapologetic about itโฆ daily.
i do yearn for someone whoโs curious and passionate about learning my mind and everything that shaped me to be exactly how i am now but forcing connections just to feel that reciprocity goes against my morals, i canโt ever force any connection