Sally Ann Hall

writer // comedian // no longer active here // FOLLOW ME ON TIKTOK OR INSTA! same handle!

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

So last night me and my husband went to a bar for our one month anniversary and did a lil sexy role play as strangers on a first date.

Later a woman pulled me aside in the bathroom to say “sorry but I was watching… It is so funny how much you hate that guy and he has no idea.”

[Sen. Lisa Murkowski @lisamurkowski]

I strongly disagree with the President’s decision on Denali. Our nation’s tallest mountain, which has been called Denali for thousands of years, must continue to be known by the rightful name bestowed by Alaska’s Koyukon Athabascans, who have stewarded the land since time immemorial.

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

@judysquirrels I’m so so sorry for your loss, Jourdain. May he rest in peace ♥️

[cas says free palestine @CrappyFumes]

Ultimately it isn’t the ghost of Christmas present or past that are able to change Scrooge. He has to have his shit rocked by the literal spectre of his own miserable death being celebrated to finally decide to change his ways.
Anyway, hope healthcare CEOs have a good holiday.

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

I know this isnt the point but Lilly jay is fuckin gorgeous and I think she’d laugh at my jokes not just to be polite but like genuinely

[em @emilyagain]

Her personal life has overshadowed this but I don't think enough people know this woman has dedicated the last several years of her life to helping advocate for sexual assault survivors and providing mental services for victims. Lilly Jay I only want good things for you!

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

@SusannaBrisk At least I was late for work lol

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

if you know who stole the hood of my car dm plz

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

@MrAlexisPereira Same!

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

remember libertarians? or did I just make that up

[Kenice Mobley @kenicemobley]

Dudes thinking about the Roman Empire so much, they’re trying to recreate its decline so they can experience it in real time

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

Learned a new armadillo fact! Will be repeating it until I die without ever fact checking

[Samantha Ruddy @samlymatters]

Would love to just blame sexism— and it definitely plays a role— but the sheer amount of unchallenged disinformation on social media is what got us here. Armadillos are all bisexual. See? It’s that easy.

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

@tmulcahey Keeping it as a plan b

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

The lord didn’t prepare me for my coworker to be in a great mood today

[captionquirk @CaptionQuirk]

Maya Rudolph cold opens with a somber performance of Apple by Charli XCX

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

just tell me who to blame and I’ll do it

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

instead of freaking out about polls all day why don’t we just wait until the real votes get counted and then freak out for four years

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

Check on your hot friends today. We are going through an invisible battle you wouldn’t possibly understand

[bradley ꕤ @bradleyberdecia]

please give it to a plus sized girl this time. It’s one of the reasons why she was bullied in the book and why they used pig’s blood specifically

[Sally Ann Hall @mesallyann]

Help! I just asked my husband to bring me a change of clothes and he asked “which clothes” as if I remember a single top I own